Today, I brought home a ukulele I had just bought. Excited, I showed my dad. He then looked at me, smirked, and said "Just like everything else you have, it's a bit smaller than normal." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my dad yelled for me. It was an emergency. I ran down the stairs, tripped, fell, and limped over to my dad only to find that he wanted me to see a video of someone playing "Bohemian Rhapsody" on the ukulele. FML
Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML
Today, I came home and was greeted by my dad telling me that he pawned my guitar for gas money. FML
Today, my mom was feeling down, so I decided to buy her a gift. Knowing she likes lighthouses, I bought her a tiny one that plugs in and lights up. I brought it home, plugged it in, and when she saw me with it, she said, "Wipe that smirk off your face and get that junk out of here." FML
Today, I was in IKEA, furniture shopping with my dad. He was looking at one couch that was particularly small. I said "dad that couch is for like a midget." I look over to see a midget looking at me, sitting on the same couch in a different color. He definitely heard me. FML
Today, my dad found the Father's Day present that I spent at least ten hours preparing and decorating. I'd expected him to be extremely happy about this lovely gift. His only reaction was to ask if he could exchange it for something else. FML
Today, my dad found his old harmonica. It’s been five hours and he shows no signs of stopping. FML
Today, my 12 year old son came home from school and informed me that he bought an air guitar for $20. He honestly thinks this is a good price. FML
Today, my mom told me that she was selling my favorite thing in the world, my trombone. The only thing that I'm good at is the trombone. FML
Today, my little brother got a violin. FML
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Top comments
Danny_B 4
Prove him wrong by showing him that its bigger than his :L
MyChemical_fml 0
Or he could've just said "that's not what your mom said!". Wincest......
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Comments (163)
xMaNNiNGx119 0
It's funny because his penis is small
ILoveEggnog 7
This is pretty much the only comment that mad me laugh.
germanyLover 3
seriously? both of you?
BigMoki 7
WOW !!! That sucks !
mvd120 0
haha that's really funny!
mariboo13 0
wow if ur on dad say that ur small than u got to be
PahhDee 0
Ahahaha great dad you got there(:
MileyCyrusIsHot 5
owned, bitch
nerdsgetmehot 23
I have a ukulele, too, and my lady lumps are way smaller than average. Hmmm. At least you're not overcompensating. Although I say that any woman who cares about genitalia size above everything else really isn't worth bothering with.
meeba 2
why did you show your dad below your waist...?
guppy40000 0
your dad knows your dong size?
rockinbecca2 4
thats sad that ur dad wuld say that