Today, I asked my parents to sign for me to enlist in the military. They asked me how much money the government gives them if I die. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
Today, my parents asked if I wanted to go to military school so I said, "Yeah, that would be awesome," thinking it was a joke. They weren't joking. FML
Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML
Today, I told my dad I want to enlist in the army and he tried to lock me in my room. He did almost the same thing when I told him I wanted to do certain college courses to make it easier to become a police officer, only there was a lot more swearing and throwing of objects. FML
Today, I found out that my parents are 28,000 dollars in debt and that my bank account has $27.17 in it. They took my money to help pay their debt. FML
Today, I asked my parents if I had a college fund because I will be going to university in two years. They laughed. FML
Today, my dad drunkenly ranted about how I should volunteer for the military because of the crisis in the Middle East. I refused; I'm in college on two scholarships and have listened to stories of why his service still gives him nightmares. I had to hide all the phones to keep him from calling the recruiters. FML
Today, I told my father I registered for the Marines, and that I'm leaving for bootcamp next week. He asked if this means that he doesn't have to pay child support anymore. FML
Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML
Today, my girlfriend of three years broke up with me because I'm in the military and I'm gone too much. The reason I enlisted in the first place is because we agreed that the money and benefits I would earn would help us be able to start a family in the future. FML
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Top comments
XCarCrashHeartsX 0
Dang, man that's ****** up.
Doopliss 0
Well, that is a reasonable question, you are putting your life at stake...
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Comments (210)
Ray_of_midnight 23
Thank you for serving, and good luck. I really hope that was your parents' bad attempt at a bad joke, because if it wasn't, dang, that's cold!
Hockeylover87_71 0
I hope they were joking... good for you, it's very brave of you to serve in the military, and good luck!
streetrace101 0
ok some ppl life suck but i laugh becuase how dumb the FML even if there life really does suck.. but this isnt funny at all.,,, i woul just forget it and not join
kira822_fml 0
I really hate you people who are saying YDI because you want to join the millitary. It's people like what this guy wants to be that is keeping us safe. It's what's keeping those who would rather not or can't join the military from having to join. It's keeping the kids in school and the people at work. Even if you don't believe the war should be happining it is so too bad. One time an army guy asked starbucks to help out by sending some coffee over. Starbucks said no because they don't believe or support the war. The thing is, whether or not you believe you should still help out by sending money or cards and gifts over to the troops. So please stop being assholes an start being thankful you can sit at your computer and go to bed without worring about being blown up. Op: thanks. You are awsome. You're parents are not.
Leaveittosteven 0
Well, the parents have to be compensated for their loss, haha.
DODORIP 0
YDI. Murderer for the state.
dk2008 3
Who says he's going to kill anybody?
Necrophile_fml 0
Not gonna start an anti-militar rant, but if you enlist you should know that there are many chances of you not coming back.
dk2008 3
I wouldn't call that an anti-military comment, you are totally right. Just remember that there are jobs that are far more dangerous.
endercoaster 0
YDI for signing up for a job where that's a pertinent question. Note: This isn't saying that it's an atrociously bad thing, I'm saying that the question is a reasonable consequence of him joining the military, ergo, it's a YDI.
jazmino15 0
Ok first of all ,all you people who are leaving comments like half a page long are have no lives and should learn how to just say what they mean already.Secondly forget **** your life,**** your parents if all they care about is money and not you!