Kids: Today, I asked my 8-year-old daughter to kill a house spider... - FML

By ihatespiders - 05/08/2014 12:31 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I asked my 8-year-old daughter to kill a house spider for me. I am a 42-year-old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 821

You deserved it 18 855

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Same thing different taste

Wuss

By kenneth - 31/08/2018 01:30

Today, I had to drive 40-odd miles to my grown-ass son's house to kill a large spider on the wall. It had him trapped in his bedroom because his wife had already gone to work. How did I ever raise such a wuss? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 750

You deserved it 1 653

You big fanny

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 17:57 - Germany - Hagen

Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall. I screamed and told her to stay back. Instead, she walked up to the spider, squished it, and told me to stop being such a baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 432

You deserved it 31 258

A job well done.

By belly the jelly - 30/10/2017 21:00

Today, I asked my husband to deal with the very large spider in our kitchen. Rather than a newspaper or a slipper, he went after it with an aerosol can and a lighter. The spider is now dead, but so are the wall and cupboards in my kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 572

You deserved it 678

Irrational fears

By emelie000 - 29/07/2022 14:00

Today, my daughter, who can pick up spiders and even snakes without flinching, screamed at the top of her lungs because she saw a mouse. Um, what? FML

I agree, your life sucks 644

You deserved it 194

Wonky fear

By mala_19 - 27/08/2023 08:00 - Sweden - Burea

Today, I saw a spider. My two year-old knows that I'm afraid of them, but in an attempt to not pass my phobia onto him, I said it was a piece of dirt. Now he thinks that I'm afraid of dirt. I did not think this through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 210

You deserved it 588

By SpiderFather - 02/07/2013 08:01 - France

Today, my seven-year-old son put a spider in the microwave. Animal cruelty? No. The goal was to irradiate it, then get it to bite him so that he would become Spider-Man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 050

You deserved it 5 866

By Anonymous - 29/06/2019 01:00

Today, my son was crying and refusing to sleep in his room because a spider ran along the wall, and it's now hiding somewhere. He’s 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 679

You deserved it 407

By JustLeaveThem - 25/01/2017 18:00

Today, I was reaching into the floor vent in my toddler's room to retrieve some toys she'd dropped. What I found instead was a clump of large dead spiders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 727

You deserved it 289

She's right, you know

By Anonymous - 27/07/2009 16:52 - United Kingdom

Today, I was babysitting some kids and helping them make a poster about insects. They couldn't think of any more insects to add so I suggested a spider, and got told to "not be a dumbass, spiders aren't insects they're arachnids." The girl is six. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 930

You deserved it 55 984

By AnRom - 17/12/2009 09:58 - United States

Today, I spent five minutes trying to kill a spider with my mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 607

You deserved it 43 947

Next

Top comments

Lavelle1313 11

Tuesday 5 August 2014 17:21

No shame necessary. Sacrifice the children.

brettrb 18

Tuesday 5 August 2014 17:21

Spiders are terrifying. I see nothing wrong with this.

Comments

neppy 6

Wednesday 6 August 2014 3:06

Many children tend to develop a fear of spiders because their parents express their fear of spiders, so it kinda "teaches" children that spiders are scary. Thus, a phobia is passed down. Even if you're afraid of spiders it's cool that your daughter isn't. I'd consider it a win in that regard!

mikeqwe 4

Wednesday 6 August 2014 4:46

Look at the bright side your daughters gonna be a badass chick!

rt58killer10 20

Wednesday 6 August 2014 4:55

Rather have millions of pestering bugs, or have the common harmless spider?

Lavakins1 13

Wednesday 6 August 2014 6:14

Your excuse should be "I don't want my daughter to be afraid of the less appealing side of nature"

Lavakins1 13

Wednesday 6 August 2014 6:15

Nature"

sbarua219 17

Wednesday 6 August 2014 6:26

Idk whether this is a YDI or FYL so I'll just comment lol

slyde32 12

Wednesday 6 August 2014 6:45

only spider I'll allow in my house is the daddy long legs, harmless to humans and they eat red backs (black widows' cousin)

gablucas 12

Wednesday 6 August 2014 7:47

That's alright I had to have my 4 year old nephew get a mouse for me :/

jds91_fml 7

Wednesday 6 August 2014 11:58

I'm a police officer and my female partner has to kill them for me. don't feel bad.

lina21 12

Wednesday 6 August 2014 20:35

Kids are fearless OP. I have had neighbor kids and friends' kids kill bugs for me on multiple occasions . There's no shame

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The Top

Today, after finally moving into a better neighborhood, my family and I were greeted by the elderly couple who live window to window to us. How? By hearing them have sex loudly and then praying for forgiveness even louder. Welcome to the neighborhood! FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 018

You deserved it 3 408

Today, my crush let me know that he has a prom date. Obviously I'm supportive because I just want him to be happy, even if it's not me. I casually let him know that I'm going with someone else too, and now he's really mad about it. If he'd asked me before, I would've said yes. Like… Hello? How dare I get a prom date! FML

I agree, your life sucks 425

You deserved it 93

The Top

Today, I finally found out why I never got invited to parties in college. My fellow students considered me too ambitious to want to do anything but study hard. The reason they thought that? I tended to be present and on time for classes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 919

You deserved it 117

Today, I broke a world record on third-wheeling with my friend and his girlfriend. As we were driving back from the beach, I took a nap and woke up to my friend receiving head in the front seat. They knew I was awake, but they continued and finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 693

You deserved it 1 013

Today, my daughter got fired from a high five figures job for making up fake religious holidays to get days off, and for almost a year her boss was so scared of being called a racist, he never bothered to look into it until today, and she was sacked 10 minutes later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 817

You deserved it 374

Today, I had to tell my teenage son that no, his knowledge of the English language was not passed down to him genetically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 593

You deserved it 3 855

Today, I went to the circus with my family. When we were looking at the animals during the break, an elephant took my purse with his trunk and ate it. It crushed my cellphone, camera, keys and wallet. After that, the circus director yelled at me for feeding poisonous stuff to his elephant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 760

You deserved it 5 538

Today, I guest-played as a catcher for a new fastpitch softball team. After the first couple of innings, the batter fouled a ball back into my catcher's mask. As a concussion test, the coach asked me what her name was. I decided to fake the concussion rather than admit that I'd forgotten her name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 228

You deserved it 6 000