Today, I arrived at my grandparents'. They already had guests so I had to sleep in the cottage. It wasn’t that bad until when I was making the bed I found a dead rotting possum in the blankets. When I told my grandmother, she simply said, "Deal with it, wimp." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to visit my grandmother. My grandfather recently died, so I had gotten her a cat for comfort. Turns out in her sadness, she had forgotten about the cat. I found its remains being eaten by ants and birds. FML
Today, while visiting my grandparents, I was afraid that one of their many cats would pee on me. I was peed on all right, by my grandma. FML
Today, I woke up late. My grandparents had slept over the night before, but they usually leave early. I heard someone in the kitchen and, thinking it was my brother, I said, "Thank god, the geriatric crew is FINALLY gone." My grandma then responded, "No, we're not." FML
Today, I made my way to bed around 4am after spending all night hanging out with my family. When I got to my bed, I started to clear a spot to lay down. Almost immediately, my hand touched something furry and cold and, fearing the worst, I turned the light on. Turns out my cat left me a half eaten rodent. FML
Today, we're having my grandmother over. Because we don't have a guest room, she is sleeping in mine. It is 25°C at night and she is sleeping naked with her dog right next to me. FML
Today, my perfectly healthy grandmother came to stay for Christmas. First, she persuaded my family to give her my bedroom. That would have been fine, until she demanded she should also have a bucket to piss in under my bed too. FML
Today, while at the dinner table, my grandmother told me she backed over a cat. FML
Today, I found out that the horrible stench haunting my apartment for the past week was the decomposing corpse of my freedom loving gerbil underneath the bed that I've been sleeping on. FML
Today, I found out my grandmother passed away. When I told my boyfriend I began to cry. Instead of caring, he said "you're getting my bed wet," rolled over, and fell asleep. FML
Today, my granddad had to start sleeping in my bedroom. He has flashback dreams to when he was a boxer, and he's already lamped my granny three times in his sleep. I get a camp-bed, and the chance to listen to him snore like a wild boar. FML
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Top comments
Rozza17 29
Tell her to go sleep there and 'deal with it'.
RodzillaX 30
Free stuffed animal. :)
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Comments (64)
rec_chem 22
**opossum
laden_swallow09 35
It's acceptable to be spelled either way. It's a regional thing.
SaturnV 25
Although, 'possum' is colloquially acceptable, 'opossum' is technically correct, as it refers to an order of marsupials found in the western hemisphere (OP is from Texas, I believe). In contrast, 'possums' are similar (though distinct) marsupials found in the eastern hemisphere.
Fluffydemise 18
Geez, the sense of entitlement amongst kids these days... You got bed AND breakfast. Score.
Jharrist89 12
You're better off sleeping outside, on the ground!
DollyDope 17
Pwnd by grandma !
dead_insects 18
yea that's when you find the number to the nearest hotel!! visit during the day, in the dead free zone!
Cazz91 21
Remind her that when the time comes to put her in a home. If she doesn't like the smell of a home your family chooses, tell her to "deal with it wimp". Don't forget to still visit her of course.
AngrySailor 17
I have found animals in a friends cottage but it's winter and they are frozen. Easy to clean up. Hate to think OP was in a more southern climate. Might want to flip the mattress!
pheebs314 17
...Might want to burn the mattress.
worldclassrager 41
Move the possums to their bed..,see what they think...
threeel3v3n26 7
was the possum ok?
buckdharma 38
The poor possom was domesticated to the point were it needed a comfortable bed to fall asleep. He died wondering why his snooty friends had given your place a 5 star rating.