Rumpkis
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I almost got a blowjob for the first time. Except I came before I even got in her mouth. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Aurora, Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob. It felt like she was skinning my dick alive with her teeth. I had to pretend to finish myself off in the bathroom and tell her it was because I didn't want her to have to swallow. FML
shmarf
Belton, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Snowball
Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, the girl that I have been trying to get with for over a year told me she was drunk and just gave her first blowjob to some guy. FML
fuck
Cowansville, Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, about 30 seconds into my first blowjob, my girlfriend threatened to cut my balls off if I didn't "just fucking cum already". FML
Anonymous
Australia 🌶️ Spicy
Nasty
Today, I got my first hand job. I started bleeding. FML
karma
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
First!
Today, I almost had an orgasm. Unfortunately, he had one first. FML
Embarrassed
🌶️ Spicy
Self harm
Today, I managed to give myself a blowjob and it was great. The only problem is that I got stuck between the wall and my bed while I was doing it. I had to call for help and my whole family came to see what was wrong. They all knew what I was doing. FML
Anonymous
Poland 🌶️ Spicy
Benefits
Today, after years of no sex, a friend of mine told me she would like some benefits. I got too excited and came before even putting it in. FML
BadBribe
United States 🌶️ Spicy
The pleasure, the pain
Today, my girlfriend decided to bribe me to be good since we were going out to dinner with her parents by giving me a blowjob. The good news: it was one of the best she had ever given. The bad news: I came on her black dress. She responded by hitting in me in the nuts. Hard. FML
noname
France 🌶️ Spicy
Today, after having waited three long months, my shy girlfriend finally gave me a blowjob. Everything was going really well until I said, "Wow, you're really talented. Anyone would think you've been practicing your whole life." FML
Top comments
fmessiah 19
Wipe up, and start again.
C19_fml 9
Well, better luck next time haha!
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Comments (263)
elcieloskyler 5
Yeah but he finished shortly after
Jammer2177 0
Omfg dude your like the guy from american pie lmfao, sad.
Jordan740 6
My first time was only 5 min. :p
aPieceOfFruit 16
doesn't that mean you *didn't* get a ******* for the first time? :D
tr3dee 0
Well at least you can get close to having a *******... My girl told me she thinks thier disqusting and said it will never happen
Bohanan88 0
Lol, damn...those days sucked!!!!
funnyman144 4
Premature ejaculation
chinte42 0
My first time only lasted 10 mins
biggybruno 0
Stop lying to us. We all know you weren't about to get a bj. You actually just walked in on your mom naked.
DrBlack 9
Nearly every male in existence has had similar experiences.