Love: Today, I admitted to my wife that I'd really like to get a Prius,...

By Rich - 26/11/2011 20:50 - United States

Today, I admitted to my wife that I'd really like to get a Prius, but I was worried that if I did, everyone would question my sexuality. She told me, "I don't know why you care, everyone already thinks you're gay." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 385

You deserved it 9 567

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Megara - 15/03/2011 05:58 - United States

Today, I was telling my dad about how I emasculated my guy friends because I can drive a stick shift while they can't. He said, "And you wonder why people think you're a lesbian." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 204

You deserved it 13 171

Denial

By TedX - 19/08/2020 20:07

Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 643

You deserved it 226

By ClosetMishap - 10/11/2009 16:25 - Canada

Today, I told my friends I had been hiding something that I wanted to come clean on. My one friend responds by saying, "FINALLY you come out of the closet. It's about time." I'm not gay. I was just going to tell them my parents were getting a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 695

You deserved it 4 742

By Anonymous - 21/10/2018 16:00 - United States - Trenton

Today, I told my girlfriend I wanted to tell her something important. Coincidentally, she did too. She wanted to tell me that she thinks she's actually gay. I wanted to tell her I love her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 279

You deserved it 239

This is me

By EchoDearEcho - 04/02/2010 14:52 - Australia

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. My mother turned to me and said, "Wait you're actually gay? I thought you were just saying that to piss off your father." I came out to her when I was 16, and have confided in her about my past relationships. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 881

You deserved it 4 763

By Anonymous - 30/06/2009 17:01 - Netherlands

Today, my wife and I went shopping for new glasses at a local store, but we didn't really get to actually buying one. On our way back, she warned me that my glasses of choice should in no way be 'those big arty ones'. When I asked her why not, she told me that I 'look gay enough already'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 758

You deserved it 6 348

The proof is in the pudding

By Anonymous - 16/10/2021 00:00 - Estonia

Today, I unintentionally came out as bi to my boss. He said he's fine with it and doesn't care either way, only that there is too much "gay propaganda" in the world and it shouldn't be shown and talked about so much. He also doesn't understand why I was reluctant to talk about my sexuality before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 919

You deserved it 442

Mixed signals

By Mark - 27/03/2017 09:00 - United States - Knoxville

Today, I asked out a coworker I really like. She gave me a weird look and said, "You're not gay?" I said no, to which she said, "Well, I am". As it turns out, I was the only one who thought she was straight, and the only one who thought I was straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 817

You deserved it 369

By augiedd - 05/03/2014 02:46 - United States - Schaumburg

Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 822

You deserved it 7 457

By LesboLover - 26/06/2019 02:30

Today, I found out that my crush is a lesbian. Everyone knew about it. Everyone also knew that I liked her. No one told me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 913

You deserved it 271

I_EAT_KITTENS_FO 5

Saturday 26 November 2011 23:17

tell her "well, I guess if I'm gay, we can't have sex anymore"

StopDropNRoll 11

Saturday 26 November 2011 23:14

Looks like a new car it is ^^

Comments

cyanidesandwich 21

Sunday 27 November 2011 0:50

Jeff Dunham has a prius, look at what he does for a living

Enslaved 36

Sunday 27 November 2011 1:03

But according to old man "Walter", Dunham is gay. That's why his wife divorced him. Lol

THE_A_TEEN 27

Sunday 27 November 2011 1:09

Walter has hated his wife throughout all of his marriage. What do you call that?

unhappybitch 8

Sunday 27 November 2011 0:59

Get a Nissan leaf?

kaykay20 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 1:15

The only worries is the price those lithium batteries it uses are why it's so expensive. You'd be better off with a average car with neat 30 or 40 to a gallon.

kaykay20 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 1:40

*near

bubo_fml 10

Sunday 27 November 2011 1:19

I got called a '******' once by a Harley biker for pulling up next to him on a rented Vespa w/ my scarf flapping in the breeze...Unfortunately for him, he didn't know I was a former all star American football linebacker...When I stood up, he shrank in terror, stammered out multiple apologies & offered to buy me drinks all night...A priceless memory!

THE_A_TEEN 27

Sunday 27 November 2011 2:09

Vespa? Scarf? All you need is a Rickenbaker 4001 guitar and you'll be Haruko Haruhara.

THE_A_TEEN 27

Sunday 27 November 2011 7:31

I guess no one appreciates a FLCL reference. Damn you guys...

FrankHotpants 31

Sunday 27 November 2011 1:25

I would go with a hummer...no one will question you then.

Eenonymous 1

Sunday 27 November 2011 1:31

Go for it, it sounds like you have an awesome wife who doesn't care about your sexual ambiguity, so what do you have to worry about?

vip3r20 8

Sunday 27 November 2011 1:35

lmao ur in Texas (lifted truck capital of the world), your name is Rich (or Richard meaning Dick) and you want a prius. yes if I was you I would be worried too.

vip3r20 8

Sunday 27 November 2011 1:35

lmao ur in Texas (lifted truck capital of the world), your name is Rich (or Richard meaning Dick) and you want a prius. yes if I was you I would be worried too.