Today, for the second time this week, I was asked to stop putting on such an obviously fake "British" accent. I am British and have lived here all my life. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I spent a full hour working on my British accent. FML
Today, my mom mentioned how she loves a certain actor's "British" accent. I couldn't help but mention that there's no such thing, and that there are lots of different accents in Britain. She got pissed and lectured me for "lying" to her and trying to make her feel stupid. FML
Today, a customer asked me if I was English, because I was struggling to understand what he was saying. I said yes. He then called me a liar, and said I must be "one of them Polish immigrants." Oh, and he also had a thick Scottish accent. FML
Today, my best friend and I went to the movies. There was a hot cashier, so I thought it would be cool to talk in a British accent to try and be sexy. I walked up and started talking when he interrupted me and said in a very heavy British accent, "I know you're faking. You can stop now." FML
Today, while my hometown mayor becomes a world-famous crackhead and douche-bag, here in the UK it has come to this: when people hear my accent and ask me if I'm American, it's less embarrassing just to say, "Yeah", rather than admit I'm Canadian. FML
Today, at work, I was helping someone who really sounded like she had a Boston accent. So, I asked her where she was from. She has never been out of state. Turns out she has a speech impediment. FML
Today, I was verbally abused by a tourist because neither I nor anyone else in my country can speak "proper English". We're in England - clue's in the name, dipshit. FML
Today, two American guys attacked me for not speaking their language. I'm from England, and they said I'm speaking my own language wrong. FML
Today, I went through a fast-food drive-thru and gave my order in a perfect British accent for fun. When I got to the window, the cashier handed me my food and said, "I love your accent!" Caught off guard, I replied, "Oh, thanks a lot!" in my normal New Jersey accent. The confusion on her face was priceless. FML
Today, my mom thought it would be a good idea for me to talk with a British accent during my job interview to make me sound smarter. I'm applying for a job at McDonald's. FML
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Top comments
Keevarou 17
Tsk tsk, some people, just tell them straight that you are indeed British and such. Not your fault that you talk the way you do, some people like to notice the smallest things. I hope you are not self conscious about the way you talk.. Good thing it was not worse though, they could have commented the way you walk or something Or the way you breathe
BFons 19
What a wanker.
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Comments (142)
DelphiCat 17
If i were to guess, i'd say OP was putting on (deliberately or otherwise) an Americanised 'British' accent or a bizarrely posh one for his region. (I have met one or two people who do this subconsciously when trying to 'impress') P.s. There is no such thing as a 'British accent'. Seriously.
Kyp_kingofhearts 12
Didn't someone already post an FML like this?
Pugs_not_drugs 9
okay people you cannot have a british accent, you can have an English accent, Scottish accent, Welsh accent or Irish accent they are all different
Parris83 9
*Northern Irish, if any of us do have to be included. Republic of Ireland is not part of Britain.
DelphiCat 17
Not to be pedantic, but geographically speaking it is the second largest of the British Isles.
Parris83 9
Unfortunately yes, geographically you can say Ireland is part of the British isles. But in no other way can you say the Republic of Ireland is part of Britain / uk. I certainly wouldn't fancy your chances if you decided to argue that one while in R.Ireland or speaking with an Irish person.
DelphiCat 17
Never said that made it part of the UK. It is still technically part of Britain though, as the term refers to the island group. Great Britain is the largest landmass of the Island group, and also contains the majority of the United Kingdom. I would love to point it out to some people in Eire, for ***** and giggles.
Parris83 9
There's no such thing as a british accent.
chuka81 27
Apparently Americans dig the Briish accent
EandL_fml 2
British English is a broad term used to mean ALL English spoken in Britain aka Great Britain (the UK), so yes there is such thing as a British Accent. There are many different kinds of British accents just like we use the term American accent meaning all the different accents spoken in the US. I love how people try to sound all smart but really all you need is a bit of common sense and an understanding of what the term British means. OP- maybe you have been around too many welsh??
Parris83 9
I, for one, am not trying to "sound smart", or to piss anyone off for that matter. The British accent thing is simply annoying to me, I can't understand why people can't be more specific. It is made up of different countries. If I was talking about a Welsh person, for example, I would say "I love their Welsh accent" etc, not "I love their British accent".
DelphiCat 17
The problem with the term 'British accent' is that it is invariably employed by Americans, who say it, when what they mean is usually 'upper-class English accent'. One cannot have a 'British accent' because that would require the island to be made up of one country, not three. COUNTRIES get to have their own accents.
diggyuk 1
No they don't. Regions have their own accent. A person from London sounds nothing like someone from Liverpool even though it's the same country
DelphiCat 17
No, they dont. But in the same way everyone from the USA has an 'American' accent, everyone from England has an 'English' accent. If people from Canada have Canadian accents not American ones, people from Scotland have Scottish accents not 'British' ones.
scott82 5
Maybe you have a low IQ and battle to speak English properly
diggyuk 1
You can have a British accent.. it's the accent of someone who comes from Britain. That incorporates Cockney, Irish, Pikey, Scouse, Manc, Geordie, Scottish, Welsh, Cornish, Bristolian etc etc
AssassinBug 15
Trade in your British for Yiddish.
Eemmaatt33 12
On the other hand, I keep being asked if I'm British due to my "accent" but I'm Australian. Every time, I have to explain that it's not an accent but actually a speech impediment. Sigh.