Work: Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt...

By CMANIA - 07/09/2009 22:19 - United States

Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt - right by my left nipple. Absentmindedly, I licked my finger and tried rubbing the stain out. When I looked up, the Vice President was staring at me in disbelief. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 022

You deserved it 6 619

Work

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Same thing different taste

Wiped out

By STIgary - 17/07/2021 16:01 - United States

Today, while at work, I had to poop. While wiping, I somehow managed to get the back tail of my shirt in between my butthole and the toilet paper, effectively wiping my ass with my white dress shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 986

You deserved it 277

By Marie - 08/06/2009 18:51 - United States

Today, I had a meeting at work with my board of directors for a potential promotion. When one of them told a joke, I politely let out an amused snort. Then, I noticed my director's white shirt and tie covered in red splatter. I nose bled all over the director of my company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 444

You deserved it 4 791

By Confused and Disgusted - 23/02/2015 23:42 - United States - Sparta

Today, while at work, a customer came up to me, stuck his finger in my armpit, then licked his finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 275

You deserved it 2 422

By Anonymous - 24/05/2019 20:07

Today, I spilled grape juice on my new white shirt. I bleached it and scrubbed it until there was nothing left to see. I threw it on, ready to dart out of the door, when my dad walks in after fixing the lawnmower and puts his greasy hand right on my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 968

You deserved it 157

You tried

By Anonymous - 22/01/2021 00:01 - Australia

Today, my colleague was wearing a beautiful dress. I decided that I had to go over and compliment her. As I walked over, my coffee cup flew out of my hand and onto said dress. She had to go home and change, and my boss had to cover for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 959

You deserved it 413

By anon - 27/03/2015 20:09 - United States - San Francisco

Today, while getting ready for a job interview, I sneezed while brushing my teeth, splattering toothpaste everywhere and ruining my brand new dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 919

You deserved it 4 779

Pinky

By grandlisleguy - 03/02/2020 21:00 - United States - Colchester

Today, I was at the office making copies for a project. As I left the copy room my dress pants caught a sharp something on the door frame and ripped open my pants. All my co-workers saw my pink boxer briefs. Now I'm called "Pinky" by everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 653

You deserved it 387

By Saucy - 26/06/2009 22:03 - United States

Today, I got marinara sauce on my new white shirt. I went in my desk for my Tide-To-Go pen and started using it on the spot. Turns out orange highlighters look a lot like Tide-To-Go pens when you don't look closely enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 578

You deserved it 50 560

More speed, less haste

By Anonymous - 26/02/2023 18:00

Today, I was running late for work and, in my rush, spilled coffee all over my shirt. When I finally got to the office, I realized I had forgotten my laptop at home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 183

**** McGee

By titillating - 12/03/2012 04:28 - United States

Today, on my way to work, I had to squeeze by a man sitting in a large truck parked next to my car. I was in a bit of a hurry and in my rush, the collar of my shirt got caught on his grill. My shirt ripped and I flashed the guy my entire boob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 922

You deserved it 4 541

Intoxicunt 5

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:26

That wasn't disbelief, it was amazement and arousal. (You mean "ink" not "pen".)

allmidnighteyes 10

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:29

He only wishes he could've "accidentally" gotten "ink" on your nipple ;D

Comments

Intoxicunt 5

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:26

That wasn't disbelief, it was amazement and arousal. (You mean "ink" not "pen".)

GR3453m0nk3y 4

Tuesday 8 September 2009 14:26

i'm assuming the OP changed "pen" to "ink" ??????

BlaisOf_Fire91 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 18:29

That's what I thought too...

Watchmaker 2

Thursday 10 September 2009 6:52

Ahah! I'm not alone!

Intoxicunt 5

Tuesday 8 September 2009 19:27

Yeah. I think one of the staff members did, actually.

DameGreyWulf 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 23:08

Intoxi, I know it would be for me! Oh, baby~ lmfao OP, that's just great

icall_BS 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 7:40

If your VP is a girl, keep rubbing and stare her in the eye. You never knoooww..

bubbly31 0

Tuesday 12 July 2011 6:26

obama posted this

The_9th_Doctor 18

Thursday 12 September 2013 0:00

it says ink.

allmidnighteyes 10

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:29

He only wishes he could've "accidentally" gotten "ink" on your nipple ;D

StudBoiAyeEm 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 23:00

lmao!

RaverYusuke 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 23:39

I swear, boss, my pen(is) got ink all over me.

folfg0 12

Saturday 2 June 2012 21:52

Retard! You don't get it, op is a GUY! Fail.

teentee401 36

Sunday 22 March 2015 5:53

Homosexuality exists, dumbass

cutiepiex3 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:30

ouch >.>

ImThePope 2

Sunday 1 May 2011 19:47

Your boobs are showing.

Immapauls 0

Sunday 18 September 2011 5:50

Hey email me [email protected]

kerrygirl 13

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:31

and its at that point you should have laughed it off and joked about it......not just sit there and let it become a FML

xMooMoox 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 15:25

Lmao you're awesome!

shamille 5

Tuesday 8 September 2009 16:42

he'd be too busy picking his nose.

danielw 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 22:43

LMAO!!!! that i favorited the fml you reffered to. It's my favorite.

evilgingy 1

Friday 10 June 2011 18:29

I'm sorry! I accidentally hit the dislike button, cause I'm doing this on my phone.... I meant like!!!!

katherinebby17 28

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:38

lol im sorry but thats funny

leili 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:42

LOL!!!! This is the best fml ever!!!!

ireply_w_lyrics 0

Tuesday 8 September 2009 9:42

"...I ran on whiskey and burned like gas, I went too far, I went too fast I’d light a fire, just to walk right through it Busted bones, dreams and tears, tattoo my heart like souvenirs life is just a word till you go through it, I’ve got the scars to prove it I lost good friends over foolish pride, drank with the devil just to feel alive I’d build a mountain, then I'd try to move it yeah and I thought that I was pretty tough, till I was brought down by a woman’s touch I got the scars to prove it..." And to add to this list today, i saw another man rub his nipple at me. This shall achieve it's own verse....