Kids: Today, after smoking, I sat down to watch Supernatural with my...

By DemonicDummy - 05/01/2017 05:06

Today, after smoking, I sat down to watch Supernatural with my young cousin. I accidentally let out a burp during a demonic possession scene and, to our surprise, smoke came out of my mouth. Now there's a crying 11-year-old hiding somewhere in the house with salt. Mom will be home in 5 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 683

You deserved it 2 703

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Same thing different taste

By eww - 13/06/2012 06:13 - Austria - Vienna

Today, I was at a big family reunion at my aunt's place. Before dinner, I went outside in the garden for a smoke. Through the kitchen window, I saw my cousin spit in the soup. Twice. My aunt patted his back and continued stirring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 876

You deserved it 2 603

By Anonymous - 13/08/2009 07:24 - United States

Today, I was smoking a cigarette while watching the meteor shower. I was just about at the filter and as I was taking my last drag, my friend decided to scare me from behind, and I accidentally sucked the whole thing in my mouth. They don't go out immediately when in your mouth. My tongue hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 327

You deserved it 56 138

By sillymink - 20/08/2016 02:06 - United States

Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of my grandfather's funeral and my cousin started cracking up. It caused a chain reaction of laughter throughout all of the other cousins and my siblings. Now my aunts won't speak to any of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 735

You deserved it 2 418

Smoke 'em while you can

By OuttaNowhere81 - 15/05/2009 04:05 - United States

Today, I was smoking a cigarette in my backyard while my parents were out, because I'm not allowed to smoke. While smoking, my parents came home unexpectedly. In a rush, I flicked it over the fence, and it landed in my neighbor's hair. It was still lit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 624

You deserved it 73 887

By Anonymous - 23/09/2009 10:23 - Singapore

Today, I was playing hide and seek with my eight year old cousin. For the past two turns, he had been hiding in the bathroom. I saw the bathroom lights on, yet again, and opened the door with a triumphant "AHA!" It was my Grandma, taking a smelly dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 407

You deserved it 38 111

No fun

By Anonymous - 03/01/2021 20:01

Today, I was finishing a cigarette outside of the mall when we heard someone fart. Turns out it was a little girl. They looked around, so jokingly I said, "We didn't hear anything." Her family giggled and so did we, until everyone realized the little girl was now sobbing. I'm a POS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 826

You deserved it 187

By lambeaster - 20/01/2016 14:27 - United States - Washington

Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 818

You deserved it 3 697

Big tasty

By reisz618 - 31/05/2019 07:00

Today, I was at a barbecue and, unbeknownst to me, took a bite of really hot bacon. In my ensuing panic, I grabbed and took a swig of my friend's beer. It wasn't beer, at least not any more. She was using it as an ashtray, and I got a mouthful of cigarette butts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 676

You deserved it 593

By Dx - 06/03/2011 07:18 - United States

Today, I was babysitting for my usual. After putting the baby to sleep I put some popcorn in the microwave and went to the bathroom. When I came out the whole kitchen was filled with smoke. One of the neighbors saw and called 911. I'm out of a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 229

You deserved it 34 881

By NaKreen - 30/07/2012 22:21 - Sweden - Bor

Today, I was at a barbecue with my extended family. I was chatting to my grandma, when my idiotic brother decided to douse the grill with his cola. The hissing sounded so much like a Minecraft creeper that I instinctively screamed and practically shat my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 136

You deserved it 32 035

Tripartita 44

Thursday 5 January 2017 7:03

Welp, you have no choice but to stage your own exorcism, writhe around on the floor, and pretend to be rid of that cursed demon.

Laphog 17

Thursday 5 January 2017 7:04

You should be glad he didn't use any of the other methods Sam and Dean have tried over the years .

Comments

Jakuri 12

Saturday 7 January 2017 0:57

I'm really curious to know what you were eating or drinking prior that made smoke come out of your mouth. ....funny as hell though. XD

jyessss 0

Saturday 7 January 2017 6:18

That kids way too old to get that scared

NuttyProfessor 7

Saturday 7 January 2017 6:18

Quick! Go grab some split pea soup for the Encore!

rissa5214 14

Saturday 7 January 2017 12:34

He said he went outside

caliguy08 17

Saturday 7 January 2017 15:18

That's one way to babysit

soulreaper12296 28

Sunday 8 January 2017 1:18

Who said they were smoking with the kid? Maybe OP stepped outside for like 30 seconds and then came back in.

amelitaliz 22

Sunday 8 January 2017 19:58

It doesn't sound like the smoked around the 11 year old, just did right before coming in to watch the show. They may have been smoking weed, not cigarettes. I have acid reflux and sometimes a few minutes after I enjoy a bowl, I burp up smoke like some kind of dumbass dragon. Here's to hoping it's not cigs :) though of course, to each their own. ✌️

LonelyAngel22 13

Tuesday 10 January 2017 0:00

One of the few FMLs that genuinely made me giggle out loud.

gusrick 20

Wednesday 11 January 2017 16:12

This is not bad at all, actually this is amazing. <img src="../lib/tinymce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-laughing.gif" alt="laughing" />

TelephoneChoir 10

Thursday 12 January 2017 17:00

That gullible at eleven? I was obsessed with Supernatural when I was ten and I don't remember ever being like that... Either way, if they're like that, you shouldn't have let them watch it.