Today, after 5 years of no intimate, sexual contact with a woman, I finally got my chance. Unfortunately, I also discovered that I have full-on erectile dysfunction. I'm 23 years old. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I finally had the chance to have sex with my crush. Too bad I couldn't get an erection. FML
Today, i discovered I can only get an erection in the presence of a real woman. My days of busting nuts alone are over. Except I don't have a girlfriend. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time in two years. With a man I love, who is handsome, very nicely equipped, and quite good at it. I was in pain the entire time. It took me 3 tries to realize there is something physically wrong with me, and once I get it fixed, he'll be gone. FML
Today, after years of impotence, I woke up with a raging boner. I was so happy until I remembered my wife divorced me last year because of my impotence. This depressed me so much that I couldn’t muster the enthusiasm to masturbate, and the boner went bye bye, never to return. FML
Today, after months of successfully taking strides to boost my long diminished libido, I found out my girlfriend, who always had a healthy sex drive, has now lost hers. Oh, how the tables have turned. FML
Today, as a 26 year-old woman, I had my first orgasm. I gave it to myself. None of my long-term relationships even came close. For almost 26 years I thought I would never have one. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML
Today, its been so long since I've been single, I’ve reached the age where I need Viagra just to masturbate since there’s no woman in my life to save the pills for. FML
Today, it's been 5 years since I started a relationship with a man who'd hidden he was impotent and I was too deep into the relationship to break it off. I accepted the sex without penetration. but since then his libido has dropped too, we have no sex, and he won't see a therapist. I'm looking up gigolos, but I can't bring myself to do it. I'm 42. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity. I also found out the side effects of my antidepressants: It's hard for me to get it up, and I can't orgasm. When I finally got it up, I went so long, it ended with her saying, "Yeah, you should stop now, I'm numb." FML
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Top comments
cutiepie343 7
Love the OP's username!! Lolz
EwanSmith 2
at least you made the effort. keep it up. oh wait a minute...
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Comments (213)
that_1_guy069 0
to much of the ole five knuckle shuffle during those 5 years?
jeffreybean 3
Don't use it, ya lose it
o7bernbutt88 0
If u were EVER able to rub on out in the past five years u DON'T have e.d. u just put too much pressure on yourself to perform and your nerves got the best of you. Just relax next time!
doglady 16
Maybe it was performance anxiety?
monsterofthapuss 3
my advice research it i had the same problem for a long time it''s a mind thing there is so much shit out in this world to help that problem you'll be fine in no time i think i got more honeys when my dick wasn't working right to be honest
TickTockFlipFlop 3
wow. i feel really bad for you. but theres hope! im going to try and help you, products like viagra and cialis only treat the SYMPTOMS of the promblem, but not the problem itself. The problem is poor blood circulation, so try some herbal things that wont hurt your dick and keep working even after you stop taking the supplements. Things like Yohimbe bark (but if you have high blood pressure, its recommended you do not use this particular herb) and muira puama, which help the blood flow, and over time actually expand the spongey material in the penis, causing it to grow some. Some herbs you can try are: Yohimbe, Muira Puama, Catuaba, Stinging Nettles, Ginseng, Siberian Ginseng, and a few others. these were just the ones i remembered. These herbs will fix the actual problem (poor blood circulation, lack of testosterone, etc,) instead of just temporarily fixing the symptoms.They can either be taken in a pill form, or be boiled into awesome and potent teas. There are even some recipes for great tasting foods, but always consult your docter before taking ANYTHING just as with any type of drug Good luck, and I hope this helped you, or anyone else who reads this comment.
chubby_choco 17
Oh my goodness, OP, I am so sorry. Have you considered that the cause may actually be emotional? Go see a doctor; it'll probably be embarrassing, but it could be the best thing you ever do for your penis.
emily50021 0
:(
serenachicka 1
Lol, I hope it's not because you watch too much ****... but if not, get more healthy and see a doctor. Good luck!
captainburke 5
You were just nervous. Shit happens.