Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while asked me if I wanted to meet her in person. Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house. When she opened the door, she screamed and called the cops on me. While detained, she called my phone asking why I never showed up today. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, the police came to my door and told me about a woman who called the cops on me because she said that I had been following her in my car. We were on the highway. FML
Today, I went on a 70-mile drive to the next town over to finally meet this beautiful girl I had talked to online. To my surprise, she looked exactly how she did in her pictures, minus the ring on her finger and the fiancé who wanted to punch me in the face. FML
Today, I texted a girl I met at the bar last night. She accused me of being "fake" because she couldn't find me on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter, then threatened to call the cops on me. FML
Today, a bunch of cops showed up at my house demanding to see my wife to make sure she was OK. Turns out my insane out-of-state daughter swatted me, calling 911 to tell them I had tied up my wife, and been impersonating her for a week. FML
Today, I drove three hours to surprise my girlfriend, who I hadn't seen in three weeks. When she opened the door, she gasped, told me to fuck off, and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, I decided to surprise my girlfriend at work. Because she was "bored and didn't feel like seeing me" she thought it would be funny to call security and claim that I was stalking her. There is now a picture of my face at her workplace, and anytime I "pester her again" the cops will show up. FML
Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML
Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML
Today, I went to meet the girl I'd been talking to online for a while, and fallen in love with. When I arrived at her house, my brother answered the door and took a picture of my shocked face. He and his girlfriend had planned the entire thing because I'm apparently the most gullible member of the family. FML
Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. We hit it off, and he invited me back to his place. As soon as we got there, his mother came out of nowhere and started interrogating me about "my intentions." FML
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Top comments
YourEvilHero 12
video chat is a good thing before meeting people off the Internet...
charvisioku 22
Whilst I think this sounds a lot like you used a fake pic and therefore deserved it... does nobody else find it a bit weird that she opened the door, saw who she thought was a completely random person, and screamed? Is that her usual reaction to someone unfamiliar knocking on her door? Bitch is crazy.
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Comments (87)
gracehi 33
Should have left the machete in the car. Anyway, in all seriousness, you got arrested just for knocking on someone's door? And you didn't have time to leave the premises before the police arrived? I have a feeling there's more to this story than you're telling us.
taltamir 6
This is the most pertinent comment yet...
jnchristensen 8
Were you brandishing a machete and wearing a hockey mask or something? And what possible charge could be filed, knocking without a license?
Feverrotes 15
This is one of those situations where I wish FML would increase the character limit on the FMLs.
james9120 7
How old are you?
Impignorate 8
If the OP doesn't respond to this with an explanation, I will never be able to sleep again.
brokenheartemo 7
She really gets into the roleplay huh? Lol
StanSmith2013 26
Now children, this is why you never meet/date anyone on the Internet. Good job you didn't end up getting shot by someone pretending to be an attractive woman!
cylus13 9
You didn't call first?
BrotherTheo 31
Always always always do the first meet in a public place. Always. There are way too many opportunities for trouble otherwise.
B1TCH 2
This is why you post real up to date photos of YOURSELF. Not a photo of some picture you randomly found or a picture of you 10 years ago when you worked out and had an awesome body unlike now when he last time you touched workout equipment was when you had to move the box at the grocery store bc someone put it in front of the little debbies... just saying...