Today, a bunch of guys at work chased me down a corridor with a Febreze spray for smelling like I'd been "sleeping in a hollowed-out horse's carcass" and having "the personal hygiene of a billy goat." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to train a new guy whose body odor was killing me. After he'd left, I had to run two industry size fans to blow the stench out of my office. FML
Today, I realized that I'd run out of deodorant. On top of that, I was late to work so I had to run, making me all sweaty and smelly. To cover it up, I used the air-freshener in the toilet at work. Everyone recognized the "Lemon Tree" scent and now all of my colleagues think I'm a cheap bastard. FML
Today, I found out I’m the “smelly girl” in the office. Now I understand all those passive-aggressive subtle comments about hygiene and showering made by my coworkers, and why a bottle of Dial body wash randomly appeared on my desk one day. FML
Today, I was running late for work and grabbed what I thought was my deodorant. Turns out, it was my husband's foot spray. Now I'm at the office smelling like a combination of roses and athlete's foot. FML
Today, I had to walk through the women's perfume section to get to my normal aftershave. A woman was trying out a perfume, which she squirted on herself and me. You can imagine the afternoon I had to endure after I got home to my wife and she could smell "some slut's scent" all over me. FML
Today, my coworker friend told me she was going to the restroom. Soon after, I did the same. Once in the stall, I could smell a stench emanating from the next one. I yelled, "Ew, you stinky bitch" and sprayed air freshener under the partition. As I left the stall, my friend walked into the restroom. FML
Today, I'm so chronically sleep-deprived that I sprayed a bathroom air freshener under my arms instead of my deodorant. FML
Today, my boss held his polo shirt one inch from my nose and asked me to smell it. He said that he was going into one of our tenants' apartment and wanted to smell him before and after so I could judge said apartment's cleanliness. FML
Today, we had an emergency lockdown in my gym class. As a result, we had to go into the boys' locker room, so naturally, it smelled like a fart in there. Some dumbass had a "brilliant" idea to spray a WHOLE FUCKING CAN OF AXE SPRAY in the locker room. I have asthma. FML
Today, I found out that someone had peed into the bottle of Febreze that we keep in the dorm bathroom. I found this out when I sprayed it onto my coat to get rid of a weird smell. FML
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Top comments
RebornProblem 0
Maybe you should take a shower more often.
saIty 17
Psh febreze can't help you now. You're going to need to pull out the big guns. Yup I mean soap and water.
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Comments (117)
goingsolo211 8
take a shower?
cynide 13
deodorant always helps, along with mint gum
lilmisslovely13 15
Or brushing your teeth instead of just using gum...
HannahLouise96 13
And actually taking a shower instead of just masking the stink with deodorant...
koe4 0
and lots of mouth wash.
Carlie_McCartney 1
Are you a guy or girl? either way, that's gross - about you, I mean. as a few others suggested, thank them! Febreeze does smell quite lovely (:
Carlie_McCartney 1
Sorry, did. spell that wrong? Febreze? D: My bad
DeathMaple 3
When you don't shower other people take matters into their own hands. Bwuahaha.
mdizzl 6
that's just gross. how can you not shower for that long and live with yourself? ugh
InYourAtmosphere 0
Man I thought we got rid of that Trojan horse..
kawaiianime 5
At least they were truthful...
TheFunSideOfTheB 2
your pic it funny
kawaiianime 5
haha thx :)
that_is_Nathy 9
I can't understand how anyone could vote "ydi" on that. No matter if these guys are right or not - this is extremly offensive and mean. No one deserves to be treated like that. FYL, OP (but really, if there is a chance you do smell and they were not only trying to make you cry, then do something about it. Sometimes it's a desease. If that's probably a reason go see a doctor. If not then take a shower every day)
sara_saturday 5
perhaps that is offensive or mean to a teenage girl, but that is how guys treat each other. and how offensive is this guys smell? if he isn't taking care of his hygiene then he totally deserves it
sematariux 7
I agree it's not offensive to anyone but you lol
wordnerd42 0
23, you get a thumbs up from me. It's not necessarily their fault; I've been inside friends' houses where the smell is nearly unbearable but the users cannot do anything about it and cannot afford to move. Whatever the reason, it makes the victim very self-conscious, and these kind of attacks hit hard. Thumbs up for considering that, and an FYL to the OP.
TJD28 3
no my friend dmells like all the time and we just tell him to take a shower. for his bitlrthday i legit gave him axe sprays, sticks, bodywash, and shampoo lol and thats why he doesnt smell like shit anymore... most of the time...
mrsvickybear 9
ew
randomlettrrs 8
its almost as disgusting as a girl with a mustache
ohrlynao 0
What an insightful, original comment! Thanks for enlightening us :)
HannahLouise96 13
The one question I'd ask is how do they know what a hollowed out horse carcass smells like?