Today, I needed to buy a new crash helmet. I went to the motorbike shop and saw one I liked the look of. It was a bit of a tight fit, and I got my head stuck in it. I had to get the guy behind the counter to help me pull it off. My ears are still numb. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I got a concussion. It was when an entire shelf of bicycle helmets tumbled onto my skull. FML
Today, I was having motorbike lessons. We were parked by the side of the circuit when one side of my gloves dropped on the ground. I tried to pick it up without getting off the bike. I lost balance, fell off the bike and the bike landed on my leg, trapping me. FML
Today, I needed to buy a new helmet. When I got to the sports shop, there was only one left in my size and preferred color. Thirty minutes after buying it, my head starts itching. Turns out I paid $40 for lice. FML
Today, I was riding my scooter at a skate park. I was wearing a helmet, but I got hot, so I took it off. Within the next minute, I fell off my scooter and cut my head open. I had to get four stitches. FML
Today, I stopped at a light when someone crashed into my motorcycle, making me fall. The guy claimed it was my fault because I'd stopped too fast. I got really mad, so I attempted to spit on his face and was ready to start a fight when I noticed that I'd forgotten to lift the helmet visor. FML
Today, I sneezed inside my helmet when I was driving 90 mph on my motorbike. No quick solutions were available to improve visibility. FML
Today, on our way to a comic book convention, I was getting in the car in my costume when my girlfriend fell against the car door, slamming it shut on my knight helmet, which broke the hinge. We couldn’t fix it, meaning it was stuck on my head for an hour while my dad drove over with an angle grinder. FML
Today, I parked, then opened my car door to get out, and somehow managed to practically knock myself out by banging my head on the frame, then on the car door that had slammed back into my forehead as I was still reeling from hitting the roof. A guy walking by asked if I was okay while trying not to laugh. FML
Today, after finally getting up the nerve to take my motorcycle to up 75 mph on the freeway, I made it off in one piece, only to fall off my bike in the mall parking lot. FML
Today, my mother finally pressured me to wear my old helmet while riding my bike. Halfway through my ride, 3 spiders came crawling out of it and onto my face, causing me to lose control of the bike and crash head-first. FML
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Top comments
saIty 17
Why do the super tight ones always have to be the cool looking ones? Like I saw a helmet shaped like a rooster, but the **** was stuck to my head. Had to use drastic measures to take it off.
Doortje 30
Ask his wife.
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Comments (53)
Daralea 21
...that's what HE said.
Ray_of_midnight 23
If it fit a little tight, that means it probably fit correctly, but "so tight my ears turn numb" is probably too tight, yeah. There are two common head shapes, "round oval", which is about as long front-to-back as it is wide side-to-side, and "long oval", which is longer front-to-back than side-to-side. Some helmet brands (notably Arai) are made for the "long oval" head shape, and some (notably Shoei) are made for the "round oval" head shape. A helmet that's the wrong shape for your head will be uncomfortable regardless of what size you choose. Yes, good moto accessory salespeople will know this, and will recognize the terms "Arai head" and "Shoei head", but at most moto shops the only help I get is, "The helmets are over there, man," so good luck. Also you should leave it on for about 15-20 minutes, if you can, and see if there are any "hot spots" where it squeezes your skull especially hard. I've been riding motorcycles since Reagan was President, and I'm hard to fit for helmets, too, because I have an unusually large head. (Funny how only the expensive ones fit me correctly. :-/ )
Adman567 9
Cool story bro
satph 12
that was so long, i gave up on reading it.
mickeygirl 0
Did u buy it?
mickeygirl 0
Ouuccchh!
humanlegacy333 5
Dumb and dumber anyone? Lol
AgentSmith79 9
You can't be from Illinois. No American uses the words "crash helmet" or "motorbike". It's a helmet, and its for a motorcycle.
stuth186 7
From one big headed bloke to another, I feel your pain
DaveMatthewsBand 4
Wow..... I guess it wasn't one size fits all.
k34nu 7
Bad times, know how you feel.. Consider yourself lucky you didn't order a large helmet and it turns around though.. Bare in mind the pads get a lot looser over time.