Terminology
Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML
Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
Today, as we were getting ready for sex, I told my man to fuck my face, and it was great until he shoved my face in his ass, yelling, "Eat my ass! Eat it!" I had to explain that ass eating is not something I'm comfortable with. FML
Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend is not a good idea. FML
Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML
Today, I learned that I don’t need to fake my orgasms, even though I’ve never been given one. FML
Today, I had to slowly explain to my brother that spooning has nothing to do with using a spoon to clean out a woman's vagina after sex. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time. I realised that I was more satisfied by last night's dinner. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend isn't gay. Apparently, I just give good head. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his bed and got crumbs in it. FML
Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "Eat it, eat it!" FML
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Top comments
Fuzzygraywolf 0
a wee bit behind on the learning curve are we? lol
Lexiesoccerchick 0
wooow, you fail.
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Comments (450)
DeadPixel4 29
What are you, 12?
abmonster7 5
Well if you count pussy then it technically is food
anakillme 6
youre too young to know that then
pepsiman404 12
smoking someone out is to get them high with only your bud. just a stoner's two cents.
Ninjerman 7
It does if you apply whipped cream! Although it isn't so great for the lady parts
zefronke8 25
Oh, you poor, poor child OP.
Dallas1216 9
What did you think it meant?
everythingelena 28
my question is what did you think it meant OP
gatorgirl7563 22
There's this website called Urban Dictionary. I think you should visit it and use it.
Rammer3500 23
Disappointing isn't it