loveyouson
This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff
Copenhagen, Denmark
Steady on, son
Today, my son got his first tooth, and is enthusiastically biting everything. I breastfeed. FML
Top comments
perdix 29
Pump your milk and feed it to him through a bottle. The next time that little bastard is going to see ******* is if he buys dinner first, or dials up some Internet ****.
Shrouds 14
Time to get the little bitter some bottle service.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (192)
slingo234 12
I breastfeed to my son is 7months thankfully no teeth yet
Mookiisfabulous 15
Mine didn't get hers until 9 months and I didn't have too much trouble...
koenlite 7
Who the hell cares?
klutz44 28
My 7 month old just got her first tooth 3 days ago. I don't think she's quite figured out how to use it yet!
shadowPlayer 6
Time to teach him not to bite before he gets a full set.
Gnu_fml 9
Ooooh, I know the feeling! My daughter used to do that too. First she got a firm grip with her teeth around the nipple, then she'd pull away, teeth still sunken in. For the grand finale? A BIG smile! Aouch!!
simoncat 11
Smack! On the nose with a rolled up newspaper! I'm kidding!!! Time to pump and bottle feed.
outoftown 26
#75, Nope, gotta save the newspaper swat for when he bites OP on the ass.
melody309 35
My mom's friend thumped her son on the nose when he bit her one too many times. He just looked at her like, "What did you do that for??" Some might call that child abuse, but the kid apparently never did it again.
smartman136 8
In some states its not abuse if it doesn't leave a mark or harm the child for more than a few moments. I personally support spanking the bastards. Makes them grow up better
ninjaqueen101 18
I must agree with that statement kind person lol
bluevayero 42
i felt physical pain and im a guy
Somefruits 24
What does the fact that you're a guy have to do with it? Guys have nipples too.
Jumpingmal2 7
Yes we do, although we don't usually have infants sucking and biting them. Hopefully...
igive 29
They aren't as sensitive as females in that area.
ShyAnn29 14
Oh my, that makes my nipples hurt!
MTL69 4
Does it make them hard too?
ShyAnn29 14
114, since this has nothing to do with hard nipples, you'll never know.
DocBastard 38
I hope you don't end up like those nutjobs in La Leche League (seriously, look it up) who continue to breastfeed their children until they are in grade school and beyond. If you ever are in the mood to be seriously disturbed (I mean not sleeping for a week), go find the video of the woman breastfeeding her 8-year old. YES, SERIOUSLY.
annie_nk 22
You cannot unseen that stuff, trust me!
lilhellian 26
Certainly a tit-illating video...
Mookiisfabulous 15
The WHO recommends to breast feed until the age of 2 and world wide the weaning ages is 4-7 mostly children in the USA the age is 4 when a child's wean... Please be more educated in breast feeding before making comments like you did.
lilhellian 26
I fail to see where doc made any breastfeeding reconmendations...
Mookiisfabulous 15
Oi! He mention women who breast feed past one are nut jobs and I was pointing that it is normal. I personally will not breast feed at age 8 but just because some breast feed that age are not nut jobs.
PenguinBitch 43
WHO as in the band? Be more specific!
Mookiisfabulous 15
world health organization... Look them up
lilhellian 26
56 1) Dr.Who? 2) Damn. I must be blind because I do not see that anywhere in his post..
PenguinBitch 43
Once again dog, I mentioned WHO not Dr. Who.
Lucy90 3
@48- Most expectant mothers know breastfeeding is the best but some do not want to or cannot breastfeed until 2. It is their personal choice. I had no problem breastfeeding my son infront of other,providing they didnt mind. I do not see it as sexualized for any woman to do so(referring to your other comment). I did so until he was 3 1/2 months, he's now a normal 3 1/2 year old and has only ever been sick once just recently for the first time (besides the sniffles). I do think woman should try, if possible, but again it is their choice.
Mookiisfabulous 15
I know that... My mother had problems breast feeding but I was pointing how he called the women nut jobs for their personal choice
simoncat 11
Winner!
DocBastard 38
Mookiisfabulous - You seem to be on a bit of a soap box here, but your research is startlingly inaccurate. That is to say the article that popped up first on google is a bunch of bullshit. Worldwide less than half of kids nurse by 23 months. Sure, the WHO recommends breast feeding until 2, but I recommend not spewing utter horseshit here, but who actually listens to THAT advice?
Ameel_fml 19
Wouldn't it be counter-productive to their growth to still be breastfeeding a child at the age of 2? By the age of 2 to 2-and-a-half, my children were eating solids and wanted to learn how to use cutlery. They were starting to learn how to hold mugs without spilling them and learning to use straws instead of sippy cups because it made them feel like "grown ups". I felt comfortable knowing that they were starting to become their own person; starting to learn about the world and how to look after themselves (to an extent, of course). To still be treating a 2 year old like a baby who needs only breastmilk seems...well, like I said...counter productive to their growth.
Mookiisfabulous 15
They will still receive normal diets, breast milk has the antibodies and benefits in their diets that will keep them healthy. It also boast their development. By age 2, they are normally nursing two or three times a day like nap time or bed time so it's not interfering any of their becoming dependent abilities. No mom is treating them like babies, they will decide if they want it or not. My daughter is almost one and already knows how to drink from a sippy cup and straw... She can hand sign milk when she wants to nurse and gets hand full solids a day...
MiloBear 11
My mother, who was a midwife, believes in letting children wean themselves off the breast. My elder sister stopped breastfeeding when she was just under two. Apparently there's a hormone that changes the flavour of the milk during pregnancy so that you're not still feeding baby #1 when baby #2 is born. I breastfed until the age of three. Of course a child that age isn't solely breastfed; I was given solids at a few months old and hit all the milestones at the right age. There comes a point where breastfeeding is more for comfort and bonding than for nutrition.
Mookiisfabulous 15
Independent*
maz95 17
Now that's going to be painful
icadragoon 11
If they bite they're not hungry. If he does bite you detach him, say no in a stern voice (don't smile or laugh), and put him back on. If he bites again take him off and put him down. If you do this every time he'll learn if I bite I won't get food.
naya_bingi 11
Not necessarily. Sometimes they bite cause their gums are itching from the teeth that are cutting out of their gums. Doesn't mean they aren't hungry.
Ukeee_X 19
Time to get a breast pump.