Today, my boyfriend told me that he believes getting kicked in the balls is a scientifically-proven method of birth control. FML
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Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to get intimate for the first time. He said he didn't want to use a condom, and that I should just give him one of my birth control pills instead, "so we can still be just as safe". What the hell? FML
Today, I discovered my boyfriend has been slipping me abortion pills to "supplement" my regular birth control. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that if I had a penis, our relationship would be better. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend throwing my birth control box at me and shouting that I was a slut for cheating on him since we never had sex. I attempted to explain the birth control was for a condition I have that causes my period to be non-existent. He didn't believe me. FML
Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML
Today, I was debating which hurts more: child-birth or a kick to the testicles. Some guy spouted the old urban legend that a nut-kick is 9000 "dels", and giving birth is 57, so I proved that no such measurement of pain exists. His comeback was to sucker-punch me to the floor. FML
Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me over for an "important chat". This chat consisted of him not only insisting that we have sex whenever he feels like it, but demanding that I take birth control pills, because making him wear a condom is "sexist and degrading." FML
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Top comments
deLongenator 4
Then kick him hard!
HolaJessicaHola 0
Kick hard. Tell him "we want to be sure, right?"
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Comments (198)
gman90210 18
Then do it and doit hard
fishereric 1
If you kick hard enough it is.
SaintT 15
He's right you know? If you kick him in the balls hard enough, he'll never want to have sex again!!!!! XD
baden18830 5
It is if the kick is hard enough to make nut butter. Permanent solution tho
smileygirl1201 0
Well kick him in the balls every time you want to have sex with him . And do it hard! Laughing my ass off
hateevryone 15
Then have some fun girl
gustavo1271 2
Kick him
ForeverHope 4
Smart man...
davek 36
I'd suggest testing that claim.
xplainphrox 8
My step grandpa got hurt riding a bike as a kid... He effectively hurt his jewels enough that he could not make babies... And all he did was land a bad jump, and smash his jewels into the bar. So it's not as far fetched as you might think... You just have to kick 'in the right spot'... And with that said... I definitely didn't kick my baby bro in the right spot when we rough housed as kids... He went on to produce 2 wonderful children of 'his own'.