Today, since my daughter refuses to eat any kind of soup whatsoever, I asked her "What are you gonna do when you’re on a date?" She replied with, "Uh...not order soup?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked the girl I’m seeing to make me some chicken soup because I was sick. She replied, “If you’re sick, go to the doctor. I’m not doing wifey shit if you’re not gonna make me a wife, let alone a girlfriend.” FML
Today, my date received food she didn’t order, and instead of eating it without complaint, she sent it back. When I got up to leave, she began to cry. FML
Today, I went on a date with a fun, attractive girl. She ordered off the kid's menu, drowned her food in ketchup, and said my burger with blue cheese and bacon was disgusting. FML
Today, I went out on a date with a cute girl. Everything was going great, until the food arrived. She not only shoveled food into her mouth like it was going to run away, she also smacked, sucked her fingers and laughed out loud with her mouth completely full. It was like dining with a 5-year-old. FML
Today, after it appeared my daughter was throwing away any vegetables in her school lunch, I packed her all vegetables so she would have to eat at least one. Nope! She threw them out and complained to school that "mommy doesn't feed" her. I got a call from the school. FML
Today, I asked a girl I liked what she was doing tomorrow night. She replied, "Cleaning, so nothing really." I then asked her out to dinner. She declined. FML
Today, when my date realised I have a daughter, her actual response was, "Ew." She then got up from our table and went and sat at the bar. By the time I paid my half (and only my half) of the bill, she was already glommed onto another guy at the bar with her hand on his thigh. FML
Today, I discovered that my daughter refuses to eat, but not because she's anorexic. Apparently, her health class has learned about the digestive system and now she refuses to "take part in something so gross." FML
Today, I made broccoli and peas with dinner. My girlfriend pouted, sulked, and refused to eat "yucky veggies", demanding fries or chips. Apparently, I'm dating a fucking toddler. FML
Today, I went to a date with a girl I thought liked me. We sat down at a restaurant, ordered some food and started talking. After 30 minutes, she said with a sigh of relief, "THANK GOD! There's my dad. Now I can leave. Bye, thanks for the dinner." The food hadn't even arrived yet. FML
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Top comments
weeping_willow 25
She has a valid point though
Lydmyers 9
You walked right into that one, OP. YDI
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Comments (17)
Bogrbon 27
Can't stand soup myself, though I'll eat it if I need to. But yeah, soup's not a make-or-break kind of thing. I think you're overreacting if it's only soup she won't eat.
Jessika Jensen 7
Smart kid!
emmalou 19
who ordered soup on a date? No one wants that slurp slurp sound haha
Matt Much 12
I'm going to have to play Devil's advocate here. That's not completely a bad thing. Most soups can have quite a bit of sodium. A little in moderation is ok, but if she grows up leaving soup behind, atleast she's being kind to her heart starting young.
Yummi_913 18
Manipulating your 5-year-old child, with dating of all things, is just a big ole no. But kudos for having a kid with common sense. You don't see that much these days.
BurnInDemonFire 39
You must be the most old-fashioned parent ever. You do know you can go on a date and not eat anything, right? Because your 5-year-old daughter does.