Sex and Intimacy: Sexy talk

Sexy talk

By Anonymous - 09/01/2010 03:30 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 849

You deserved it 6 003

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/01/2011 21:10 - Lebanon

Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 395

You deserved it 5 001

By Anonymous - 16/05/2012 20:34 - Netherlands - Kerkrade

Today, I called my boyfriend during his lunch break. He started to place his order at a fast food joint, and trying to be funny, I started moaning sexily after each part of his order. I eventually realised I was on speaker when I heard snickering in the background. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 738

You deserved it 32 283

Dirty talk

By Username - 24/02/2010 15:06

Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 782

You deserved it 4 769

Not now

By anonymous - 02/02/2011 05:17 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Right before I was about to climax, he asks, "Do you remember when you bought the homeless guy with one leg a hot dog?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 344

You deserved it 4 720

Kinky

By sandwichsex - 08/08/2009 22:39 - United States

Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 183

You deserved it 12 019

By isoheartcaitlin - 25/08/2009 03:34 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 372

You deserved it 6 168

By PTKFML - 26/07/2009 04:37 - United States

Today, while in the middle of having sex with my husband, instead of saying something sexy in my ear, he whispered, "We are so gonna make pizza after this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 814

You deserved it 7 620

By elisimo - 24/01/2012 08:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a burger. Feeling frisky, I sat up and took off my shirt. He looked at my chest, at his burger, then back at me and said, "Give me a minute, I don't want my food to get cold." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 564

You deserved it 35 860

By Undefined - 01/01/2009 12:09 - France

Today, I was at a restaurant with my boyfriend. I look him straight in the eye and ask him: "What's the first thing you think about when you look at me?". His answer: "Can I finish my steak?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 331

You deserved it 8 636

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 311

You deserved it 2 764

imcooool 0

Saturday 9 January 2010 9:29

haha I'm sorry but that made me lmaooooo! haa

CH723 0

Monday 6 February 2012 6:33

he was trying to be funny and lighten the mood. how in ***** name does that deserve wrath ?

Comments

temescal 0

Saturday 9 January 2010 9:25

Boyfriend deserves whatever wrath he has coming to him for honestly answering the "what are you thinking" question. I guess everyone has to learn some how.

CH723 0

Monday 6 February 2012 6:33

he was trying to be funny and lighten the mood. how in ***** name does that deserve wrath ?

imcooool 0

Saturday 9 January 2010 9:29

haha I'm sorry but that made me lmaooooo! haa

Shadow1368 17

Tuesday 16 August 2011 0:33

This isn't an FML, this is awesome. I would love to have a bf who has the same sence of humor as yours. Don't be mad because he made a super funny joke. Take a chill pill. -DT

Gucci_Girl 2

Saturday 9 January 2010 9:34

Hahah. I wonder if that turned you off.

Dildo_Saggins 0

Saturday 9 January 2010 9:36

And your life is bad how? your getting laid!

SCARYMUSIC 0

Monday 9 August 2010 16:14

idc what anyone say that's a win!

J3R3MYY 14

Wednesday 21 September 2011 2:08

And ur mad cause u arent!!

me5 0

Saturday 9 January 2010 9:46

Who's arbys?

minisquid 9

Wednesday 7 September 2011 7:28

Get the **** out of my office.

jacob128 4

Sunday 9 October 2011 23:49

We automatocally know you dont live in the US

michael666 7

Tuesday 9 July 2013 22:35

HAHAHA that "get the **** out of my office" I always tell people when they say stupid shit, "get the **** out" and point towards the door, lmao ima say this from now on.

simawesome_FYL 0

Saturday 9 January 2010 9:46

what is that ?

nyklo 11

Thursday 18 June 2015 13:51

Fast food restaurant

elishaax 0

Saturday 9 January 2010 9:57

it's a burger xD lmao

jair_lhao 0

Saturday 9 January 2010 9:58

it's what they say in the restrouns comercial. it's a restaurant @6

extinct_fizz 0

Saturday 9 January 2010 10:01

silly girl. never ask what a guy is thinking unless you actually want to know.

tyrob911 0

Saturday 9 January 2010 10:02

it's a restaurant. picked the line from the commercial "im thinking arby's." your bf is my kinda guy. ladies don't ask questions if u don't really wanna know the answer.