By emptypockets - 28/06/2020 17:00
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My heart bleeds for you. You just got a free house. How will you ever cope with that?
OP and spouse could have been saving for years to make their dream home exactly how they wanted it to be. (We've been in our home for 10 years and we finally fully finished our basement ourselves!) And then Grandma passed leaving her home, OPs husband wants to ditch the home they've been in and put an extreme amount of time, thought and money into for another home to start all over. Have a were bit more compassion, imagine working so hard for so long to get something you absolutely love, only to now have little or no choice to give it up because your spouse wants to move instead? Shit happens, people all around the world make more and less money than you and I; but to shit on and your wants in a home and now it seems like OP really has no choice? She's allowed to be upset. This isn't a war about money, it's more about time and effort being thrown to the wind.
It's a matter of presentation. If OP had said, "After [X] years of happy marriage, my husband and I are close to divorcing because he just inherited his grandmother's house. He insists on moving into it, whereas I am extremely attached to the house we already live in," or "After pouring vast amounts of blood, sweat and tears into renovating our dream home, my husband wants to throw it all away to move into the house he just inherited from his grandmother," or "I thought I could finally relax after years of renovating our house, but my husband just inherited his grandmother's house, and he wants to move into it and start the whole exhausting process over on that house and I just do not have the energy to cope," then I would agree with you. But OP put more emphasis on the money than anything else. The money is pretty much the least important player in this scene. As worded, this comes across as a whiny first-world problem.
As a husband myself, if he's debating moving into that house, the FML should start with the wife saying "Today, after spending thousands of dollars on remodelling and painting our house, making it exactly how "I" wanted it." My wife has a laundry list of changes she wants to the house, that really don't matter in the slightest to me, or that I actively dislike, but that I don't seem to have much say in. If he's wanting to move it's because he probably never cared about the thousands of dollars in remodels in the first place.