Today, at the age of 29, I now have a relationship on par with a teenager's. Several weeks ago, my fiancé and I lost our home, and are now back living with our respective families. We now have no privacy. I actually just got dropped off at home, before 10, after having sex in a hay field. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I often do, I had sex in my old car. I'm 25, my boyfriend is 28 and we're still living with our parents. FML
Today, I had the most amazing lesbian sex of my life with this girl I had been crushing on for so long. Today is also the day I became practically homeless, courtesy of my parents, who apparently never heard of knocking before entering. FML
Today, the lease on my house ended and I finished moving in with my girlfriend. After everything was moved in, she broke up with me. Hello homelessness. FML
Today, after I moved in with my best friend a year ago, living with her and her boyfriend for over 3 months, I couldn’t handle them fighting so I moved out 9 months later. She cheated on her boyfriend with a coworker and is now moving in with me, so, "We can live like wild teenagers." We’re both 30 and I’m not single. FML
Today, my dad found condoms in my room and kicked me out of the house. I know I’m 22 but I have nowhere to go. When I told him this, he threw a rolling suitcase at me and told me, “You have somewhere to go now - your boyfriend’s house!” I don’t even have a boyfriend, just casual random hookups. FML
Today, I learned that my 29-year-old boyfriend won't stay the night at my house because he lives at home with his parents and doesn't want to have "the discussion" with his mom about me. FML
Today, my dad caught me having sex with my secret boyfriend, so he threw him naked into the street. I’m 28 years-old and it’s my house. This kind of bullshit is exactly the reason I kept my boyfriend a secret and why I got a mortgage I can barely afford, just so I didn’t live with my dad anymore. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I moved into our own house. He proceeded to invite his parents to stay for the week. The same parents we've lived with for the past 5 years. FML
Today, my fiancé of over 5 years and I split, since I don't want kids and he does, which I have told him throughout our relationship. It gets better: we live in a house that his father owns and his father wants me out… in a fucking week. FML
Today, after my fiancé and I recently separated, their choice not mine, we decided to stay friends, and still live in the same house. Now I get the pleasure of listening to him flirt and have long conversations with some girl every night. FML
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Top comments
chunkalicious 7
Well.. Demand some allowance at least, and get yourself a nice motel room.
Undefined323 5
FYL indeed. Hopefully you can get back on your feet.
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Comments (84)
rott3n 6
Sex in a field, sounds kinda hot!
LuckyLynx7732 5
I applaud OP on the correct use of a semicolon. Well played sir.
Bekll 31
At age 29 I would hope OP could properly use a semicolon, so it's not worthy of praise.
opoopu 8
Maybe both of you can move in TOGETHER and squeeze inside one of your rooms, and then take turns to move back and forth on alternate weeks. (One week in her family's house, next week in his)
vbmg152 19
I wouldn't allow that & I doubt their families will! If they were married, then it's be ok!
KaiserSD 8
Well, when you act like a teenager and are irresponsible with your finances, this is what happens.
doglover100 29
You'll be back on your feet soon. At least you live somewhere.
yeti37 16
workin on a sex farm tryin to raise some hard love plantin your seed --Spinal Tap
AnyaS 19
Most teenagers don't have a fiancé.
dukefoiegras 7
The hay field sex actually sounds pretty cool. Keeping it natural!
imperialtl 12
Sounds awesome. I want to have sex in a hayfield.
sheethapins 13
Doesn't matter, had sex.