you should have it put on your headstone

Also ******** without stinking up the place. Well, that concludes my wish list.

Farting flowers.

Ok... I guess there is a lot more a guy can ask for hahah

He's so romantic :')

"here lies Lisa, the quietest shitter we knew"

"she was number one at number two"

Women are like ninjas when they fart or sh**. No one knows it ever happened...

#36 watch the "change up" see if you don't change your mind

Probably the best compliment you could ask for. I find it awkward as hell setting in another room and hearing someone grunt out a huge shit. But seriously just be glad he is with you and dont question it too much he may realize you aren't for him and leave.

. . he could ask for someone that doesn't shit in front of him. My husband and I, 17 years together and never once shit in front of each other. They say to leave somethings a mystery, ******** is on top of the list.

73, What if you get bored in there by yourself? I like to throw parties in the bathroom when i go. Just don't serve any food ( sanitation issues) and you will be fine.

"Her number two was as quiet as this grave."

here lies Lisa, the "super duper pooper"

We're phantom shitters

Hes a keeper

If he's able to appreciate your silent poops, then you have a perfect man.

At least he didn't say,"Your hair looks small."

^ what're you saying?

56, Im relatively sure women don't feel the same way about their hair as guys do about their dicks.

It's from always sunny in Philadelphia

And yeah 81, you'd know better than any other guy. I'm guessing you get told you have a small dick quite frequently.

No need to be rude.

I get bigger when I smell the perfume of a beautiful woman.

to be able to joke around and poke fun at each other? it absolutely sounds like a good one.

^ she gets it

Erm... since this got posted on FML we can definitely conclude the OP doesn't "get it" ...therefore yes maybe bad relationship. Personally I like that kind of banter.

Since when is every FML always serious? The great majority of FMLs are actually just funny moments shared.

Bad pun

No, it's a well worn out pun.

The intelligence required to make that pun is as low as it is boring, I dare to say it was never funny. @51

I would dare to say that even now under the right circumstances it would still be funny. (*ﾟ∀ﾟ)つ＝lニニフ(prepares for the down votes)

Or could be number two..

@#8: Seriously? The least one? What about taste? ;)

#33, you're making us all sick, particularly those of us having our evening snack.

you can mask the smell with some air spray...