Today, a guy for whom I did a design job told me he would only be able to pay me in 3 weeks. I told him that it was OK, as long as I didn't have to follow him around to collect my money. "Don't worry, I know the feeling," he said, "I used to run an illegal business." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to pick up my last paycheck, since I was fired last week. My boss said he wasn't going to give it to me. I told him it's illegal not to, and he told me with a shit-eating grin, "What are you gonna do? Arrest me?" FML
Today, I'm working in China and I had to explain to my boss that no, it's not okay to not pay me for 3 months. FML
Today, my boss told me I was fired 3 weeks ago because there's no money to pay me, meaning that I worked the last three weeks for free. FML
Today, after I've been cleaning a hostel 7/7 for free accommodation for a few weeks, and the owner telling me 3 times to take a day off while he was able to do the job, I'm finally leaving. He's now (and only now) asking me to pay for the 3 nights I "didn't work for." FML
Today, after days of working with a client on plans for a project, I received a message halfway through completion, saying the deal was off because my prices were "so low, it seems like a scam." FML
Today, I found out that the landscaping job I started three weeks ago is actually for an illicit business run by a hippie who pissed away the entire payroll to fund his drug habit. He has no way of coughing up the $900 he owes me. I'm broke as hell, and my electricity is now going to get cut off. FML
Today, I asked a co-worker if he'd cover for me while I slipped out to cash some money at the bank. When I got back, I found out that when he said "yeah, sure" he actually meant "yeah, sure, I'll tell the boss and get your dumb arse suspended". FML
Today, I finally finished a drawing that someone had asked and said they would pay me for. I worked on it for multiple hours and was very proud of it. When it came to discussing payment, I asked what his best offer was. A pack of cigarettes. FML
Today, the guy whose son I babysat for six hours straight confessed to being broke, then actually asked if he could pay me with sex instead. FML
Today, I was selling weed to a guy by text. He was using our code, saying, "Can I book a tutoring session at 6 o'clock?" I asked, "How many hours do you need?" He replied, "Three please." I said, "Sure." Then he said, "Just leave it in the blue Adidas again." FML
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Top comments
ComoEsJuan 24
The mans word is his word, and he said "used" to. Two strong reasons to build a trusting partnership.
themysteriousfox 18
I don't know if I'd trust that "in three weeks" crap...
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Comments (61)
kibster9 20
You should definitely try to get that money as soon as possible. Just to be safe, let your lawyer know what is happening.
Obito_Uchiha651 17
Sure because that's how the legal system works
sanchogrim 18
As if everybody has lawyers to help them with that crap lol?!
ComoEsJuan 24
The mans word is his word, and he said "used" to. Two strong reasons to build a trusting partnership.
xTommytheGUNx 15
exactly i know those kind of guys and trust is everything to them he will pay you OP
Crazion 26
Nope
JazzHandsFML 28
nope what? nope you won't wear the shackles of society? nope you refuse to support the decisions being made by your government? WHAT IS IT MAN
derangedplanet 23
Nope like what people yell when they see a spider maybe? crazion can you let us know if you saw a spider?
JazzHandsFML 28
if that's the case then this comment makes even less sense
trex454 21
@18 depends on the size of the spider
shay_serendipity 29
9, another beautifully matching profile icon to go with the comment
Crazion 26
I was just saying nope to the illegal business guy geez lol.
couchcat 25
what did he do?
DesolateTree 12
He may not have mean he sold something illegal but that the business wasn't legal. I used to work under the table. I did my work and got paid but I wasn't on the papers.
saraaa2552 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Im here early and don't have a witty comment to say
derangedplanet 23
Well aren't you rather distasteful.
mds9986 24
Then don't comment.
saraaa2552 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Don't tell me what to do
XxDanno316xX 27
You know, not all comments need to be witty or have a pun. Normal comments work also. :)
Obito_Uchiha651 17
Then what's your purpose of commenting
marianajade 22
Good luck with that
HappyItalian 38
Not saying he won't pay you back, but as an artist, this is why I make sure to always get the commissioner to at least pay half before I get started just in case.
beeferjay 34
I can just see the follow up fml...
StarkWolf_fml 23
where's my money *punch you gonna give my money man *punch getting real tired of you ducking me man *punch
Brandi_Faith 34
I picture that episode of Stewie trying to get his money from Brian and beating him with a golf club and shooting him in the kneecaps. Best episode ever.