Moving day

By Anonymous - 11/09/2015 18:49 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I told to my girlfriend of 5 years that I'm depressed about having no friends, no job and a difficult family life. I told her that she's the one constant that keeps me going. She decided this was a good time to break up with me to "find" herself, since I was being so mopey. FML
I agree, your life sucks 26 322
You deserved it 3 824

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It's so sad reading all these FMLs of people with relationships of years and the other brakes up due to the other being depressed, or losing their job etc. I'm sorry op

Try and join a group where you can talk about your problems. I'm sorry for you but she sounds like a bitch.


Clearly she's worthless trash. She did you a favor.

Really? You hardly know anything about the situation, but you think you can call her worthless trash? People don't usually break off a relationship of 5 years for no good reason at all. I mean, OP has no job, no friends, and is depressed - doesn't exactly sound like the catch of the year now does it? I mean, that's all very sad and I sincerely hope OP finds a good way to deal with all this, but it can be a very big burden on a partner, and at some point the burden can just get too big. Maybe OP's girlfriend simply can't handle these issues any more because they make her depressed as well, or maybe she doesn't see a future with a guy who has so many things in his life not working out, or maybe she thinks OP doesn't take enough action to make his life better. Whatever it is, she has the right to not stay in this relationship.

27, not sure why you're typing up short stories like I'm going to actually read it. This is FML, not a lecture hall. Don't take yourself too seriously.

jairienfaite 20

27 Does have a point. We don't know how long OP have been like that. It could even be his own bad attitude. Life don't curse you to have no friends, a shitty attitude does.

Sorry, 27 made viable points, all which I agree with. Not everyone chooses to be trapped,at some point we need to enjoy are life too. Even, if it means cutting ties, There WAS ample time to make corrections, As well weight of PRO's an CON's

We can all just agree to disagree. I think it's a bitch move to kick somebody when they are down. That's just me, though. it's whatever.

@ 1. Your comment just made my blood boil

56, thanks for letting me get under your skin so easily.

My Step brother sort of went through the same thing. His girlfriend and him had been toghther for awhile when he eventually found out that she was bat shit crazy and suicidal. He didnt want to leave her since he was afraid of her doing something awful afterwards.

Badkarma4u 17

Clearly you didn't comprehend what op typed. How many women who arent "worthless trash" would stay with a guy with no friends no job and family problems. You know the old saying if a person doesn't have friends theres a reason.

I can understand her leaving OP. I just think her timing was terrible. You don't break up with someone immediately after they say something like you're the only good thing in your life. In my opinion, she should have at least waited a couple of days.

tantanpanda 26

#29, thanks for letting us know you're too dumb to read a comment. *someone presents a counter argument* nah, I'll just be an ignorant fool cuz I'm too proud to be wrong. That, is you.

77, I'm dumb because I don't take this app that seriously? Okay, guess I'm a raging idiot then lol

Weirddate 11

I agree. She is worthless and self centered. My ex-husband left me when I had been clinically depressed for months. Reading all these posts, it sounds like everyone on here would agree with him! If you care about somebody other than yourself, then you should be there for them.

sometimes you have to look at what the other person it's going through. If you feel depressed and maybe bitchy, think about what she may have been going through. it's not fun to have the person in your life always complaining or just not happy in general. other side of the coin... If she loved you and thought you were the one for her, she would put the time and energy into helping you feel like you again. fyl

If someone's just going through a bit of a hard time, and you love them and genuinely want to be with them, it makes sense to just hang in there and support them while they're taking the time they need to get better. But if times have been hard for a really long while already, and maybe the relationship wasn't going that great to begin with, and you can't really see things getting better, that's a very different story. And for those saying it's low to kick someone when they're down: sure, it sucks when your SO breaks up with you while you're already feeling horrible, but wouldn't it suck more if they would stay just to avoid hurting your feelings, and then eventually break up with you just when you thought things were getting better? If my SO doesn't believe in our relationship anymore, I prefer knowing about it right away, no matter how much it hurts.

not really, in rare case, even with positive attitude, you could have no "close friends" but more like tons of "acquaintances". Some people has a hard time making new friends, trust me I seen in people who even has the most friendliest attitude in the world; attitude that would make that person be more likable than they think but people tends to judge and if they happen to not like one or two quality about that person (looks, voice, conversation, etc.) other than looking at their true sweet nature self; they don't want to hang out with that person. Same situation applies to family members

It took her 5 fucking years to realize they don't have a future she's obviously fucked in ways to do that to that guy

How is this not in the top 2 comments?

larrena2377 26

Wow that sucks. Sounds like she's not worthy of you. You'll find someone better, OP!

Badkarma4u 17

How can you even say that?

Dnt get y she got dwn voted but bro needs to use this time to b in a r ship with himself nd work on all those things that r putting u dwn first b4 u try to solve ur prob by getting another chick.

that really sucks op. she didn't deserve you anyway.

You're better off without her OP. Maybe you should go hang out somewhere, save up money to travel, anything that would involve meeting new people. And more importantly, see a therapist to help you out with that and give you advice, it could really help out a lot rather than getting no help at all

OP has no job so saving money for a journey or a therapist are probably no options for him.

A journey, yes, but I know from experience that there are ways to get super cheap (and even free) therapy if you don't have a job. Free health clinics, medical schools with interns, and some places have people who are trying to get their master's degree and have to work in an office as a student for really cheap. I got decent therapy from a student and it was $5 a session, and then I went to a local clinic and got it for free. So I hope OP utilizes those options :)

OP is in Canada. No doubt there's all sorts of affordable resources and services to get help. I hope they do.

Try and join a group where you can talk about your problems. I'm sorry for you but she sounds like a bitch.

AllyJo1231 15

Well she's horrible. It will get better and I hope you find someone better! :)

I would like to believe she was probably feeling exhausted and helpless after being with him so long. It is by no means easy to be in a relationship with someone who says that you're their only happiness. That type of pressure and neediness could easily drive the other person away.

Yeah, I can't agree that she's horrible. Being someone's emotional tampon is not a fun job, and if OP has been whining but not doing anything about his situation, really I can only commend her for sticking around so long. There's only so long you can put up with someone who won't take care of their problems.

Thank you so much for giving me the phrase "emotional tampon'" I'll probably be giggling all day!

That's awful all around. It's terrible she wasn't able to be empathetic or compassionate towards you. It can be hard being with someone who is suffering from depression but after 5 years together you guys should be ride or die. I'm really sorry OP. I hope it doesn't make you slip deeper into it but it probably will. Seek help, life doesn't have to be like this for you.

AnyaS 19

She could have been compassionate and empathetic to his troubles, for all we know. It's possible she could only support him for so long as a partner and realized he wasn't going to (perhaps not being willing enough) get himself better.

tantanpanda 26

You know what else is hard? Dealing with someone with no income and depression. By the wording of the fml, it sounds like OP has been jobless for quite awhile. So many people blame the girlfriend but if you were in that position for 5 years, how the fucking hell would you feel? Your Significant other is draining away your money, always negative and clingy. Most people break up over the most trivial thing. This is a REAL problem that she's facing. Are you going to ruin your future for someone you're not sure is going to get out of their slump? FOR FIVE YEARS, PEOPLE. I know that depression is a thing, but when you suck the money out of your SO and act like they're the only thing keeping them going, you can't expect to stay together forever. She sounds like a better than average person who was just at the end of her rope.

It's so sad reading all these FMLs of people with relationships of years and the other brakes up due to the other being depressed, or losing their job etc. I'm sorry op

I somehow doubt OP was only just diagnosed with depression. It sounds like OP and his ex were in this unhealthy dynamic for a while.

I feel for you, OP. this is so sad. I promise you things will get better if you work towards a goal. I'm sorry, don't let it get you down too much.

Unpopular opinion coming through but that's a lot of emotional responsibility for one person to shoulder for their partner, while the way she did it could have been way more tactful I'd probaby feel I was being put in a difficult position if my own partner was to tell me that as well.

After 5 years together, though? It can be incredibly hard being with someone who is suffering from depression but If they made it 5 years they should be able to weather the storm.

Oh yes I agree, but after a while it can just get too much for some and they don't know how to bow out gracefully. Being someone's only good thing in their life can just prove to be too much pressure sometimes :/

That's true. It's impossible even to carry that burden. She shouldn't have that responsibility but she could have been supportive and helped OP find help. Maybe it's been like this for a long time and she needed an out. Sometimes hitting rock bottom is what a person needs to pull themselves out.

I actually thought of that as well. I think that when OP said that she was his rock and kept him going, she realized that isn't the case for her (though she had probably been thinking about it for a while). So instead of lying, she broke up with him. And I doubt it went Cold-hearted

I agree completely, and I'm depressed myself. Putting all your crap on one person is going to make the other person feel like they're drowning, and drowning people will do anything to come up for air.

jairienfaite 20

100% with you. We dont know the full story. OP could totally have a bad attitude for so long too. This could be lasting for over a year and ahe did her best and this right there was the last drop? People are too quick to victimize the person that cant defend itself.

I know we tend to think (especially after five years) that you should be willing to be supportive and to fight for your partner, but being in a relationship like this can be draining. Rough patches can bring people together or divide them. If she didn't want to stay, that doesn't necessarily mean she's cold-hearted. You are allowed to break up with people and end relationships. Love can fade and if the relationship isn't strong enough, it's better to move on. If she no longer loves him or if that relationship brings her misery instead of happiness, she should leave. Staying in a relationship that you're not happy in isn't fair to anybody. If you love somebody, you stand with them and support them. If the love is gone, staying isn't doing anyone any favors. Yeah, it sucks for OP, but do you really want a partner who stays with you out of guilt and not love?