By Anonymous - 11/09/2015 18:49 - Canada - Brampton
By Anonymous - 11/09/2015 18:49 - Canada - Brampton
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Really? You hardly know anything about the situation, but you think you can call her worthless trash? People don't usually break off a relationship of 5 years for no good reason at all. I mean, OP has no job, no friends, and is depressed - doesn't exactly sound like the catch of the year now does it? I mean, that's all very sad and I sincerely hope OP finds a good way to deal with all this, but it can be a very big burden on a partner, and at some point the burden can just get too big. Maybe OP's girlfriend simply can't handle these issues any more because they make her depressed as well, or maybe she doesn't see a future with a guy who has so many things in his life not working out, or maybe she thinks OP doesn't take enough action to make his life better. Whatever it is, she has the right to not stay in this relationship.
sometimes you have to look at what the other person it's going through. If you feel depressed and maybe bitchy, think about what she may have been going through. it's not fun to have the person in your life always complaining or just not happy in general. other side of the coin... If she loved you and thought you were the one for her, she would put the time and energy into helping you feel like you again. fyl
If someone's just going through a bit of a hard time, and you love them and genuinely want to be with them, it makes sense to just hang in there and support them while they're taking the time they need to get better. But if times have been hard for a really long while already, and maybe the relationship wasn't going that great to begin with, and you can't really see things getting better, that's a very different story. And for those saying it's low to kick someone when they're down: sure, it sucks when your SO breaks up with you while you're already feeling horrible, but wouldn't it suck more if they would stay just to avoid hurting your feelings, and then eventually break up with you just when you thought things were getting better? If my SO doesn't believe in our relationship anymore, I prefer knowing about it right away, no matter how much it hurts.
not really, in rare case, even with positive attitude, you could have no "close friends" but more like tons of "acquaintances". Some people has a hard time making new friends, trust me I seen in people who even has the most friendliest attitude in the world; attitude that would make that person be more likable than they think but people tends to judge and if they happen to not like one or two quality about that person (looks, voice, conversation, etc.) other than looking at their true sweet nature self; they don't want to hang out with that person. Same situation applies to family members
You're better off without her OP. Maybe you should go hang out somewhere, save up money to travel, anything that would involve meeting new people. And more importantly, see a therapist to help you out with that and give you advice, it could really help out a lot rather than getting no help at all
A journey, yes, but I know from experience that there are ways to get super cheap (and even free) therapy if you don't have a job. Free health clinics, medical schools with interns, and some places have people who are trying to get their master's degree and have to work in an office as a student for really cheap. I got decent therapy from a student and it was $5 a session, and then I went to a local clinic and got it for free. So I hope OP utilizes those options :)
Yeah, I can't agree that she's horrible. Being someone's emotional tampon is not a fun job, and if OP has been whining but not doing anything about his situation, really I can only commend her for sticking around so long. There's only so long you can put up with someone who won't take care of their problems.
That's awful all around. It's terrible she wasn't able to be empathetic or compassionate towards you. It can be hard being with someone who is suffering from depression but after 5 years together you guys should be ride or die. I'm really sorry OP. I hope it doesn't make you slip deeper into it but it probably will. Seek help, life doesn't have to be like this for you.
You know what else is hard? Dealing with someone with no income and depression. By the wording of the fml, it sounds like OP has been jobless for quite awhile. So many people blame the girlfriend but if you were in that position for 5 years, how the fucking hell would you feel? Your Significant other is draining away your money, always negative and clingy. Most people break up over the most trivial thing. This is a REAL problem that she's facing. Are you going to ruin your future for someone you're not sure is going to get out of their slump? FOR FIVE YEARS, PEOPLE. I know that depression is a thing, but when you suck the money out of your SO and act like they're the only thing keeping them going, you can't expect to stay together forever. She sounds like a better than average person who was just at the end of her rope.
That's true. It's impossible even to carry that burden. She shouldn't have that responsibility but she could have been supportive and helped OP find help. Maybe it's been like this for a long time and she needed an out. Sometimes hitting rock bottom is what a person needs to pull themselves out.
I know we tend to think (especially after five years) that you should be willing to be supportive and to fight for your partner, but being in a relationship like this can be draining. Rough patches can bring people together or divide them. If she didn't want to stay, that doesn't necessarily mean she's cold-hearted. You are allowed to break up with people and end relationships. Love can fade and if the relationship isn't strong enough, it's better to move on. If she no longer loves him or if that relationship brings her misery instead of happiness, she should leave. Staying in a relationship that you're not happy in isn't fair to anybody. If you love somebody, you stand with them and support them. If the love is gone, staying isn't doing anyone any favors. Yeah, it sucks for OP, but do you really want a partner who stays with you out of guilt and not love?
It's so sad reading all these FMLs of people with relationships of years and the other brakes up due to the other being depressed, or losing their job etc. I'm sorry op
Try and join a group where you can talk about your problems. I'm sorry for you but she sounds like a bitch.