Well hey, at the very least you can laugh at him when things don’t work out a week from now :)

Sound like she graduated loaded with summa cum.

Would've been better to replace "loaded" with "laude" tbh.

I thought of that, and I thought of “lauded,” but I thought “loaded” sounded enough like “laude” and has the correct meaning.

I hope explaining my process makes the joke funnier! I doubt it did:(

I get that signal from my penis all the time.

If there's any justice, she won't feel the same way, and you can refuse to take him back.

Funny how if we're the one "getting dumped" we were wronged by an asshole, but if your the one getting INTO the relationship its "romantic". I guess it's all in our viewpoint.

"Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, so call me maybe?" sums this one up perfectly. I hope he's just as successful in getting that girl as Carly Rae Jepsen was at getting the guy at the end of her music video.

You gotta use that pinky

All is fair in love and war... He'll figure it out soon enough and will post his own FML because you're unavailable.

Your title sums it up perfectly. While I think people can leave relationships for whatever reason (if they don't want it anymore they shouldn't stay in them) I completely understand you being heartbroken over it. Especially since you yourself probably met people you found attractive and didn't decide to throw your relationship away just because some other person turned you on.

I wonder if she feels the same way, or is he some creepy stalker dude? You might have dodged a bullet with this one.