Money, Animals and Dogs: Kamikaze

Kamikaze

By Hot Dog - 29/12/2022 09:00

Today, my dog was cold, so she kept sitting around the oven. When I opened it to put my pizza in, she hopped into it. The massive yelp of pain as she did so is going to haunt my dreams… and my financial stability. Even the vet has no idea how she's still alive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 502

You deserved it 223

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Same thing different taste

By mayhemily - 21/09/2015 16:22 - Canada - Aurora

Today, I passed out in my kitchen and was woken up by my dog. Not because she was worried about me, but because my body was blocking her food dish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 476

You deserved it 2 974

Deep dish

By Grauncho - 22/09/2012 14:12 - United States - Chicago

Today, while dog sitting my neighbor's Great Dane, I decided to order pizza. As soon as I received it, the dog stood in the hallway staring at me. As soon as I moved, he ran full force and knocked me into the door, causing me to fall and drop the pizza, which he promptly devoured in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 721

You deserved it 3 606

Clever boy

By Anonymous - 28/01/2023 02:30

Today, I found out my dog can open the fridge. Now I have no food left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 687

You deserved it 118

Fire hazard

By ThankfullyNotKickedOut - 26/08/2016 18:17 - United States - Coldwater

Today, I was trying to cook a pizza for lunch at my in-laws. I preheated the oven and took my dog out to go potty. I come back in to find the house filled with smoke, the detector going off, and a fire in the oven. Apparently, my mother-in-law left a tray of glass candle holders in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 570

You deserved it 4 129

Woof!

By NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - 23/01/2023 01:30 - United States

Today, I was walking to my room. My friend's dog, who has always seemed to hate me for no reason, let out the loudest bark he could muster the moment he saw me. Not only did he scare the absolute fuck out of me, he also made me drop my pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 759

You deserved it 145

By humanchewtoy - 07/07/2018 20:30

Today, I was lying in bed recovering from a laparoscopy with my dog laying next to me. I fell asleep and later awoke to a burning pain on my incisions. My dog had decided the stitches would be fun to chew on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 927

You deserved it 482

By Jlipka - 22/05/2010 02:33 - United States

Today, while house sitting, I went to take my pizza out of the oven, not realizing that the oven mitt had a hole in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 840

You deserved it 5 597

By Anonymous - 23/04/2011 05:11 - United States

Today, my dog disappeared for an hour. After I'd called her name repeatedly, she crawled out from under my bed, threw up on my feet, and then happily walked out the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 097

You deserved it 4 160

By Anonymous - 20/12/2012 19:50 - Spain - Santa Cruz De Tenerife

Today, I was woken up by my dog scratching at my door. After a while of this, I finally got up to let her in. When I opened the door, she looked at me, threw up, and scurried away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 991

You deserved it 9 662

By BW - 03/01/2010 16:04 - United States

Today, I woke up on the coldest morning of the year to discover that the gas fireplace has run out of propane, and there is no water because the pipes are frozen. While trying to locate the frozen pipe, I forgot to let the dog out, and she peed on the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 095

You deserved it 5 481

kristinagir 11

Thursday 29 December 2022 9:48

Oh my gosh! I hope she has a fast recovery. I’m so sorry

Shzusuziq11 10

Thursday 29 December 2022 16:15

When I'm working at the stove, my dog is not around, just for this very reason!

Comments

kristinagir 11

Thursday 29 December 2022 9:48

Oh my gosh! I hope she has a fast recovery. I’m so sorry

Shzusuziq11 10

Thursday 29 December 2022 16:15

When I'm working at the stove, my dog is not around, just for this very reason!

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 29 December 2022 16:36

I hope the pizza was ok! ...oh, yeah, and the dog, too.

emmalou 19

Friday 30 December 2022 8:17

I can't imagine a dog being that dumb lol but still I jumped in the oven not a fire pit so why are we surprised it's alive

SirEnigM0nk 22

Monday 2 January 2023 16:33

That poor pup :( I hope for a speedy recovery and that she has no permanent tissue damage. Please, keep her out of the kitchen when using the oven going forward (not because she's likely to go near it again but better for CYA).