Today, my roommate unexpectedly came home with a new puppy. I'm severely allergic to dogs. When I reminded her of this, she explained that the puppy was her family now and if I didn't like it I should move out because blood is thicker than water. My roommate is my sister. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my wife isn't speaking to me and is considering separation because I got rid of the puppy she surprised me with for my birthday. She knows I hate dogs and I'm severely allergic to them, but thought it would be a happy case of "Dad later falls in love." FML
Today, after leaving my mom's house, I got 4 text messages from her about how I was a terrible person for not saying goodbye to my sister when I left. The "sister" she was referring to is the family dog. FML
Today, my mom confessed to loving my "little sister" more than she loves me. My "little sister" is the family dog. FML
Today, it's my wife's birthday. Since I had work, I gave her $200 to spend on herself and left. When I came back with dinner and the movie she wanted, I found her with a dog. She is very attached to him because the shelter was going to put him down. I love him, but I'm allergic to dogs. FML
Today, my sister came to stay with me in my apartment for the last few weeks of her difficult pregnancy. However she didn't tell me she was bringing her two dogs, her jackass of a husband, my bratty nephew, and an inflatable kiddie pool so she could have a natural water birth in my living room. FML
Today, to celebrate moving into a new apartment, my girlfriend decided she would get a kitten. She didn't know I'm allergic to cats. When I told her, she decided that she couldn't date someone who couldn't be around her cat; the one she doesn't have yet. FML
Today, my asshole of a roommate finally decided to move out. Not only did he take his belongings with him, he took some of mine as well. Including my dog. FML
Today, I've been living with my new roommate's dogs for three days now. In an ironic twist, the small one is very well-behaved, while the two big ones are disobedient little shits. Every day, I get a thousand more reminders as to why I'm a cat person. I can't do this anymore. FML
Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML
Today, my girlfriend got evicted for having too many dogs. She expects me to let her and all 5 dogs live in my one-bedroom apartment. When I told her no, that I’d get evicted too, she said that should be a sacrifice I’m willing to make for “our family” if I really loved her. They aren’t even my dogs. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Aeroxx1337 17
Clearly her skull is thicker than her blood.
Miss_Latina 13
Now you have 2 bitches as roommates
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (100)
GamerAM 12
Actually, The whole saying is 'blood of the covenant is thicker than water of the womb', as in the people you choose as your family are more important than those you are given as a family. So, No, it applies to anyone you choose to be your family. OP was using it right.
MzNViziBLe 8
Sell the cute lil thing, than tell her it left her.
Locoluis 15
Tell your parents about this. I'm sure that your sister will not mind not being in their will. After all, the dog is now her only family. She can inherit its belongings when it dies.
ASVP_ADJ 3
If she was your sister, why wouldn't she know you are extremely allergic to dogs. And even if she did but just didn't care, that makes her a huge bitch that obviously doesn't care about other peoples issues which confuses me, why would you be roommates with her?
WeskersSexslave 15
leave. dogs are cute.
matt369 2
Sounds like her way of booting you out for whatever reason. In any case, I'd move, myself. Wouldn't want to live w/ someone, sister or not, who pulled that stunt.
prinncess00 16
Just have someone kill the dog for you... Problem solved
JackFaire 27
Ask her when her and the dog served in battle together. She is half right "blood is thicker than water" is an old saying that means the blood you shed with your fellow soldiers is thicker and more bonding than the amniotic fluid you and your siblings shared.
AssassinBug 15
You should buy gloves and a protective suit, and offset the cost buy selling the dog to your local Chinese restaurant.
KatNamanski 16
The good news is that you're the smart sister!