I'll leave you to it then…

By scared shitless in ohio - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Dublin

Today, I decided to be friendly and say hi to the weird kid at school, who was sitting by himself eating lunch. After I said hello, he stared up at me intensely and said, "I don't have many friends. Yeah. Mainly 'cause I've eaten most of them." FML
I agree, your life sucks 44 302
You deserved it 5 617

Same thing different taste

Top comments

emirie 21

That's the type of friend I'd want.

The weird kids always grow up to be CEOs or chairmen. Or axe murderers.


emirie 21

That's the type of friend I'd want.

1PersonIsMyWorld 22

He was probably just joking around. Most people who spend their time alone develop a different sense of humor..and on top of that he could have been showing you his weird side to see if you'd stay around for his other side..like kind of putting a hard shell on from people hurting him. All in all, I wouldn't take it literally op, look into it deeper.

TyT63 12

I'm sort of a loner at my school and I put up barriers and hardly ever let people in but I wouldn't tell someone I ate my friends

I know a lot of the "weird" kids at my old high school were likely to tell weird jokes or seem off-putting because people would pretend to be nice then mock them.

That's what you get for talking to the weird kids. Just leave them alone.

My best friend and I are best friends because she couldn't draw a duck one day and even though she was shy and weird she came up to me and said, "Uh..can you draw me a duck?" I drew her the duck and and we've been best friends since then. That was 3 years ago.

Dswank620 18

I'm from Ohio too, maybe we can all be friends! Ya know cuz I usually prefer to drink my friends

24, it's never a bad thing to try to be nice and friendly towards someone, even if they are content being the weird kid.

1PersonIsMyWorld 22

thats a cute story 58. I hope u both are friends forever.

58 That was the most touching story I've ever read. :')

I've eaten my best friend, and she and I have been friends for years now.

#1, same here! I'd LOVE to get involved with someone whose friends are all cookies! :D

55, the wierd kids are ussually really worth talking to. Most of my.friends right now were ones I didn't really know when I first met them. It ended up they were pretty cool. As people say "you shouldn't judge a book by its.cover"

Am I the only one who sees this kid talking to his food everyday because he has no friends, and then going through a "Wilson!!" moment from Cast Away after he eats his lunch?

incoherentrmblr 21

#78: Drink your friends...what?

#27: As one of the weird kids in school, I agree wholeheartedly.

The weird kids always grow up to be CEOs or chairmen. Or axe murderers.

The weird kid from my school joined the military. Made sense, since he seemed to have a fascination with bombs and other weaponry...

1PersonIsMyWorld 22

Never make fun of the weird people..they'll come back and cut your leg off and watch you slowly bleed out.

16 - you sure it wasn't like the Taliban or something?

jasmine2301 25

#28, you sound like you know what you're taking about...

Like Johnny, the homicidal maniac :D I think he only used an axe once, though..

A good reason to befriend them. And keep them full.

#28 Reminds me of Dane Cooks scetch of the Creepy Guy at Work.

CEOs and chairmen because they've eaten everybody above their old position! The weird kid from my school works at Walmart :/

AurumPotestasEst 16

Years of making this mistake have not been able to keep me from being nice to the weird kid bc I feel bad that everyone else is mean to them. Got stalked once. The point is, it could be worse.

61- are you 9 years old? because only 9 year olds would think it's lame to hang out with a girl if you're a guy.

1PersonIsMyWorld 22

84..no he was referring to how loners get mostly girls attention because girls are more sympathetic than guys.

#84 and #88 Christ, I certainly hope I'm not the only one that caught #61's obvious sexual innuendo. Otherwise I AM inclined to believe you're all 9 years old. #61, at least this creepy old man appreciates your jokes!


Me too. I would have asked him how they tasted.

Dawnstempest 17

@ 63 Like chicken... I'd imagine.

I have eaten many deliciously friendly chickens. I might be running out of friends too.

I've ate the lettuce that was talking to me once. Luckily, it seemed to be one of those friends that you actually hate. It tasted pretty good and was quite satisfying.

shy_and_bubbly 6

nothing sounds more like a cool person then "I don't have many friends. Yeah. Mainly 'cause I've eaten most of them." ;)

LiterOfCola 16

I think you mean, "I have tons of female friends because I eat them out." That would make someone popular.

Ch_rae5 19

I agree with #24 that was a very tastless comment....it didnt even make sense..

Unless you're really depraved, of course. I'm sure he won't mind eating another friend.

Metal_Avenger 9

Well maybe thats why he is the weird kid

Not really, I find that sentence in my daily vocabulary. My friends are finger lickin' good. Seriously. The finger is a delicacy.

amaindayyy46 20

If he's lying then he's funny and you should be friends with him. If he was being serious, please don't get involved with a cannibal. I think we both know how that would end.