Today, I decided to be friendly and say hi to the weird kid at school, who was sitting by himself eating lunch. After I said hello, he stared up at me intensely and said, "I don't have many friends. Yeah. Mainly 'cause I've eaten most of them." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was together with a few of my friends when I got up the courage to confess I have an eating disorder. One of my friends then said "... but you're not skinny." FML
Today, a kid from my school called me, saying he's going on vacation to Japan soon and that since I was born there, I could teach him the language. His exact words at the start of the call were, "Hey man, you speak Asian, right?" I have to be around this shithead 5 days a week. FML
Today, a girl in my class introduced herself to me for the fourth time this semester. Am I really that invisible? FML
Today, I started a new school, after moving from England to New York. People only talked to me just to hear my accent. FML
Today, a colleague found out that I struggled with anorexia when young. After ranting about how it's a silly 'Women's disease', he renamed me 'Miss Piggy' and made oinking noises every time I ate something. FML
Today, a man next to me was feeding the birds when he ran out of food. We were at Adventure Island and there were "Do not feed the birds" signs everywhere. The birds then became aggressive and started savaging the both of us. FML
Today, our school started an anti-bullying policy, and we watched a video about bullying. After the video, I told a teacher about a bullying case going on that I know about. His response? "Tell someone who cares!" as he walked away, chuckling. FML
Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom stall when a man made eye-contact with me through the crack in the door. I quickly looked away, but about a minute later I looked back to see if he was gone. He was still there and was actually trying to keep making eye-contact with me while I pooped. FML
Today, as I waited to fly home, a very attractive woman smiled and gestured towards the seat next to me. However, a hyperactive child and his mother barged past into said empty seats. The woman really hit it off with the guy behind, while I was stuck listening to a kid scream at Angry Birds. FML
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Top comments
emirie 21
That's the type of friend I'd want.
DocBastard 40
The weird kids always grow up to be CEOs or chairmen. Or axe murderers.
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Comments (91)
Setareh23 34
Hopefully you didn't tell him you were sitting next to him because you thought he was "weird" or "a loner" and needed a friends. The fact that he said "I don't have many friends. Yeah." leads me to think you probably brought up his lack of friends. It was a really nice thing of you to do though (so props), but if you really did address him anywhere near the way I mentioned above, then I agree with others that he may just have been putting up barriers, afraid you just wanted to make fun of him. Just always be careful around people who seem "weird" because if you do become their only friend they may become very dependent on you, and not everyone can handle that. If it's that sort of case, you gotta make sure to put up boundaries :)
worldclassrager 41
Does he try to always be alone? By heating that I would think that he says that to have people leave him alone...
TrackGirl19 29
He probably just doesn't care for friends.. he intentionally scares tthem off :P
sonnyrosa 32
Baaaaaaaaaaaack away slowly... then run for your life
TheRealPitBoss 17
He's just shy and that was just a nervous reaction. I encourage you to try it again bring him out of his lack of a better word shell. Some of my best friends in the world was the so called weird kid.
kaitlynjane 28
This reminds me of Johny the Homicidal Maniac :D
pazuzus_intern 10
Why? Johnny wasn't a cannibal.
TheDrifter 24
Invite him home to visit, then toss your legs over his shoulders and see if your new friend is a picky eater. What's the worst that could happen?
NessaMae 19
Make that kid your best friend. I would.
naimejeary 16
Kid doesn't seem all that weird to me. Seems like he'd be a kickass friend :) obviously he was just screwin with you. You should have sat down and said 'unfortunately for you I'm not very tasty :) '
Evie_fml 14
Wait, your FML is that you encountered someone else's twisted sense of humour? Jesus Christ.