Love, Embarrassing, Food and Intimacy: Hidden secret

Hidden secret

By anonymous - 01/10/2016 09:00 - Australia - Tennyson

Today, I was with my boyfriend. He got up, shut the blinds and turned around to say, "I don't usually shut the blinds, but no one can see this." Assuming we were going to have sex, I took my pants off. He asked me what I was doing, then sat down to eat an entire tub of ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 255

You deserved it 2 123

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Same thing different taste

By soooyeah - 30/04/2009 12:15 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear "pop goes the weasel" outside my house. My boyfriend stops and excitedly says, "ICE CREAM MAN", flips me over, grabs his clothes, and runs out of my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 112 982

You deserved it 18 533

By sandwichsex - 08/08/2009 22:39 - United States

Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 133

You deserved it 11 979

By elisimo - 24/01/2012 08:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a movie and eating a burger. Feeling frisky, I sat up and took off my shirt. He looked at my chest, at his burger, then back at me and said, "Give me a minute, I don't want my food to get cold." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 560

You deserved it 35 831

By weirdlove - 23/01/2010 08:38 - Australia

Today, while my boyfriend and I were eating ice cream, he put his arm around me and began leaning in for what I thought was a kiss. Instead, he grabbed and began jiggling my stomach fat, along with making raspberry sounds. Once he was done, he did the same to my thighs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 615

You deserved it 7 989

So hot

By bonesniffer - 16/09/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, I crawled into bed, naked, wanting to get some, and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass, and said "Oh…" then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 770

You deserved it 6 037

New one

By Anonymous - 07/02/2020 12:00 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I closed my eyes while my boyfriend was fingering me, and I felt a cold liquid inside me. I opened my eyes, and he was pouring yogurt into me. He said “I wanted to try something new.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 430

You deserved it 454

Turned on

By Anonymous - 04/04/2009 10:57 - Denmark

Today, was the first time my boyfriend slept over. He was hard, so I woke him up by whispering in his ear, "If you could get me to do anything right now, what would it be?" His response, "Can you get me a bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream?" He was hard, for ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 447

You deserved it 14 926

Disinterested

By lily - 13/09/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I slightly opened my eyes during it and saw him with his eyes wide open, watching TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 355

You deserved it 340

By unwantedlove - 25/02/2011 18:36 - France

Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 145

You deserved it 6 906

By sad-sexed - 06/09/2010 12:50 - Australia

Today, I was lying on my bed with my boyfriend. I didn't really want to have sex so I told him I would if he really wanted too, but I wouldn't enjoy it. He then started to undo my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 090

You deserved it 55 501

hemiol 30

Sunday 2 October 2016 16:53

Why not both?

Scarylizard1798 23

Sunday 2 October 2016 16:50

Priorities lol

Comments

Yudith_fml 6

Sunday 2 October 2016 17:54

Was he watching a cheesy chick flick while eating it?

cuz803 44

Sunday 2 October 2016 17:54

He obviously is very sensitive when eating ice cream. He has priorities

loxe_fml 15

Sunday 2 October 2016 17:56

Cherish that relationship

species4872 19

Sunday 2 October 2016 18:19

Easy

Red_Ralph 16

Sunday 2 October 2016 18:59

Looks like your going down a "rocky road" in your relationship.

Talented73 54

Monday 3 October 2016 0:16

"Going down" ain't got nothing to do with it -- unless it's going to be on a tub of ice cream!

vegantreegirl 26

Sunday 2 October 2016 19:30

There needs to be an "awkward" button for FMLs like this...

Talented73 54

Monday 3 October 2016 0:18

I agree. As a vegan, it must be awkward to deal with people who indulge in dairy products :-)

MessedUpLife00 13

Monday 3 October 2016 8:27

@29 Just because you believe that you shouldn't eat or drink animal byproducts, or anything like that, doesn't mean that everyone else should stop. It's our choice, and you have no right to try and control what we put inside our bodies. I don't care if you are vegan, don't try to put others down for not being like you!

Letters_numbers 2

Monday 3 October 2016 16:18

@29 I am going to get extra bacon on my cheeseburger today, just because I saw your judgmental comment. I think I am going to make that a thing from now on. Maybe I will get a large milkshake too. I can think of no more noble a cause than pissing judgmental vegans off.