Today, my older brother and I were teasing our mom about her age. When we jokingly told her it was hard for us to watch our parents get old, she responded by saying, "Yeah, well, it's hard for me to watch my kids grow up and not have anyone who wants to marry them." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom asked me out of the blue if I was ever going to consider getting married. It wasn't until after the conversation ended that I remembered my siblings are all either single like I am, or incapable of having children. I am my mother's last hope of becoming a grandma, and she reminds me all the time. FML
Today, my 5-year-old daughter said "Mommy, why doesn't anyone wanna marry you?" I've been asking myself the same question for all too many years. FML
Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML
Today, my mum asked when she's getting grandkids. I had to tell her that, at 21 years-old, I hadn't even managed to get a boyfriend yet. FML
Today, my mom bitched me out for still being single at age 19, and still not having started a family. She considers this "immoral," yet showed nothing but praise for my sister, who's pregnant at 15 and doesn't know which of three guys is the father. FML
Today, my mom has been aggressively trying to get me to marry one of her coworkers, who is around my age. Apparently she loves her like the daughter she always wanted, and since it would be silly to adopt her; she is determined she will be her daughter-in-law instead, whether I like it or not. FML
Today, I was talking with my mother and expressed my slight disappointment at how many of my friends are getting into relationships, whereas I'm still single. My mother decided to encourage me by saying "Don't worry, sweetie. There are boys out there who don't go for looks. You'll be fine". FML
Today, my 58 year-old mother told me she’s having a baby. Apparently she hasn’t started menopause yet, but assumed from her age she wouldn’t get pregnant when she started seeing a man she goes to bingo with. 58 years-old. My little brother/sister is going to be 36 years younger than me. FML
Today, my fiancé expressed concern for her mother's health and a desire to be with her in Texas. I called her mother, who is 69 years young and will outlive us all, and it came up that her brother's BFF, who my fiancé has been crushing on since she was a tween, just got divorced and moved back to Texas. FML
Today, my brother came out to our family as being gay. My mother starting crying because she "wanted grandchildren." I told her that I was planning on having children. She started crying harder. FML
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Top comments
YoungE 0
lol what happened can joke but not take it?
SliceNthrice 0
snapppp
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Comments (115)
MishaMash 9
I don't feel sorry for you, Anon... You made fun of your parents' age first, so you really deserved it.
dabears1011234 27
You just got knocked the FUG out!
mikelangele 15
never ever joke with a woman (even your mum) about her age. ydi! when you get a gf make sure you don't make the same mistake.
fmleli 11
ydi and yeah you can make jokes but u can't take em?
allyiscute1 22
Lol burn! Be nice to your momma(: