Today, I was at my friend's house for the first time in months. I saw her new Chihuahua, Mickey, and he was excited that new people were over. I picked him up and slightly bounced him in the air. Because of the bounce and his excitement, he peed a little bit… straight into my eye. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a friend came over to meet my new dog. The dog got excited and accidentally peed on him. I went to the kitchen to get something to clean it up. When I came back, my new dog was covered in my friend's pee. My friend claimed that peeing on my dog "showed dominance." FML
Today, while at work for a dog groomer, I picked up a new puppy that came in for a groom. I held it up at face level with me, baby talking it, when it promptly began peeing. Luckily, it didn't get on my clothes. Unluckily, it got onto my face and into my mouth. FML
Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML
Today, as I was washing the dishes, I felt what I thought was a mosquito on my leg. I kicked at it with my foot only to realize that I had just kicked my adopted puppy in the face. Now, whenever I come into a room, he runs to the corner and pees. FML
Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML
Today, I was visiting my grandma who has a beagle named Max. He was so excited to see me, he jumped on my face and peed. FML
Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. to my dog jumping off of my bed. No big deal. I rolled over to the other side of the bed to fall back asleep and my face landed right in a puddle of his pee. I tasted it. FML
Today, when I woke up, my dog excitedly came up to me and licked my face. A few minutes later, I find out he had thrown up twice before he licked my face. FML
Today, I was at a party, chatting up this guy while we were petting my friends dog. The dog had just been outside and was kinda wet, I assumed it was raining out. Just then someone came up and said "Um, that dog's covered in pee." Apparently someone peed off the deck onto the dog as it walked by. FML
Today, I couldn't sleep. I had to pee really badly but I'm terrified of the dark, so I closed my eyes all the way to the bathroom. On the way, I tripped over my dog and fell face-first into the door frame. He then humped me as my nose bled all over the floor. FML
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Top comments
MiniatureMayhem 0
Chihuahuas tend to do that.
that_guy321 2
you, my good sir/ma'am, fail miserably
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Comments (52)
MiniatureMayhem 0
Chihuahuas tend to do that.
Trollinggx3 0
Piss in my eye!!
the_stereotype 0
chihuahuas freak me out
planbsponserme 2
what did you expect dumb ass. they have small bladders that can't take pressure and excitement. ydi
supertacowaffle 41
chihuahas are rats
1m_b0r3d 0
umm.....yeah....my dog did that once and it is a pekingnese.....she peed on my crotch when i picked her up....
GR3453m0nk3y 4
ugh!!! thats gross i remember in show-and-tell in like fourth grade some kids brought in his frog and it pissed while he was presenting it and the moron just let it do its thing. all over us.
4ddie 0
I hope you washed your face/eyes after. c:
SquareBox39 0
YDI for having a cat. 1st
that_guy321 2
you, my good sir/ma'am, fail miserably
Cazly_420 0
or 5th.... Even though no one cares what number you are.
radman 0
Fail miserably doesn't seem quite adequate.
Pointy130 0
This is why chihuahuas suck.
Serial_Killer 0
if u had a real dog u wouldn't have had to pick it up. your fault for being dumb enough to put a small dog near ur face.
sobe23 0
a dog is a dog no matter how small! I have a chihuahua and I couldn't ask for a better dog! She can't knock people over, she doesn't hog up the bed, she doesn't eat as much as big dogs (so cheaper), and she loves everyone unconditionally!
Ranoona 0
did it sting? But that is gross.
melissasmile21 0
i have a chihuahua and every time i come home it gets excited and when i pat it, it urinates on the floor. how fun.
Intoxicunt 6
Ouch. Golden eye from a dog. That should be illegal.
Koalafrau_fml 0
Makes me wonder 'bout James Bond... I had never contemplated the double-meaning...