Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while waxing my bikini line, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me which caused me to close my legs. I am now sitting in the sink with my best friend pouring hot water "down there" trying to remove the wax. FML
Today, I was trying to shave down there. I'm about 6 months pregnant, and I can't see past my belly. I ended up scaring the crap out of myself into thinking I was miscarrying until my baby kicked and I realized I had just accidentally cut myself with the razor. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom trying to wax her butt. FML
Today, I was given a lapdance by a pregnant stripper. FML
Today, I tried to be sexy and asked my husband of 6 years if he wanted to "put a baby in me." He shook the recent belly fat I gained and asked, "Is there room for a baby in there?" FML
Today, when getting my eyebrows waxed, the lady cursed "oh shit!" under her breath, right after waxing half of my brow off. FML
Today, my husband confessed his pregnancy fetish to me, and now wants me to wear a fake belly when we have sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend snuck up behind me while I was naked and whispered in my ear to bend over. I thought this was a lead up to doggy style but nope, he slapped a waxing strip on my exposed bum hole and ran off yelling, “No more hairy hole! No more hairy hole!” FML
Today, I went to get my underarms waxed. I'm usually not self-conscious because I figure they see worse stuff all the time. When I raised my arm for her to wax my armpit she looked at me, laughed and said, "Well I guess that's how I know it's winter in Wisconsin!" FML
Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML
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Top comments
JustKittyKat 24
Attempt to be social and funny: fail. Initiate plan B; Silently rip off stranger's pubic hair.
surfbumblonde 7
The word "snatch" lives up to its two meanings here.
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Comments (160)
scuttlebuttz 1
Someone made a joke. **** MY LIFE RITE GUYS?!?!
crazy4uboi 6
Thats really odd, must have been one of those jokes that sounded better in her head. By tye way What's the point in being sexy? You're married so he's already yours and your pregnant... Just saying.
robert76 5
Seriously? A lot of women are sexy for themselves, it makes them feel good. A lot of other women actually care about their partner and want to be sexy for them to make them happy. The former case is even more pertinent during pregnancy as women tend to feel less sexy and depressed due to a combination of the baby bump and hormones. I mean, did you think that train of thought out to its completion?
InfiniIII 6
WHAT THE MOTHERFLUCKING FLUCK?
roxybeachgirl7 3
that's the freakiest thing ive ever heard. i don't even know how i would have responded to that.
GetDirtyDoWork 1
Im laughing so hard right now
melrose90210 10
Well, you know where your kid is if it ever goes missing
dmadsen33 9
Weird comment from the waxer, certainly, but really I think your husband is a bit of a jerk for not finding you, his own wife, sexy while pregnant. I bet you look great!
boyElroy 6
It's funny how creepy that is
lhazz11 23
I think she proved it pretty well actually.
doglover100 28
That is creepy. I wouldn't know how to respond.