Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
Today, I was caring for a bird that had flown into my window. I thought the poor thing wouldn't make it, when it shit in my hand, flew into my neck, then around my living room for ages before I could manage to get it out of the window. FML
Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML
Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML
Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML
Today, a bird took a dump on my truck as I was driving and the wind pushed it into the keyhole. FML
Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML
Today, I left for my shop in the work truck at 6 a.m. I was still in the process of waking up with my windows down, on a semi-busy street, when BAM! a bird flew in the window into the cab. FML
Today, I mowed over a bird while mowing the lawn. It wasn't dead, so I had to mow over it a second time to put it out of its misery. Now there are pieces of dead bird all over my lawn and I can't sleep. FML
Today, I ran to my car and zoomed to work to avoid being late. I was in such a hurry, I forgot to close all my windows. When I got back to my car, I found a dead squirrel inside. FML
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Top comments
Boweezee 0
Even dead animals deserve respect. YDI for being disrespectful, and obviously not as clever as you thought.
KwitIt 0
I'm surprised it didn't just smear dead bird all over your windshield. Gross. You got kinda lucky.
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Comments (123)
loserninja 0
O_O YDI
xavierdevoy 0
This is one of the rare FMLs that're so ******* retarded it has to be true.
jussjess 0
How is that clever? Lol @ # 16.
musu_fml 0
#5 The operative word is DEAD: once something is dead, how on earth can it be upset about how you treat it? Oh right, this isn't about the bird's feelings; it's about YOUR feelings. You don't give a shit about the bird. You only care about you being upset.
Tori_xoxo 0
Ewwwwwwwwwwww :l..
amiss 2
That's what you get for thinking you're clever.
pleasedonttellme 0
That's sad
SAF_fml 0
You're a pussy
fretforyerlatte 0
oh for god's sake. i suppose OP should have stopped their whole day and had a ******* burial ceremony and prayer for some random bird. wtf ever. come on, guys, seriously. i could see this happening, cuz i know when there's a shitload of snow for example on the windshield and i try to use wipers, if the door or window is open it WILL fall right back in on you. and i don't blame the OP, who wants to touch some nasty dead bird? it could have mites, or who knows what. eww dead things...
justdesserts 0
YDI for being mean to a dead bird.
UseTheFrags 0
#5 Because it's dead...who cares? :