By Anonymous - 9/6/2021 02:01 - Luxembourg - Luxembourg

Broken dreams

Today, I discovered the man I'm in love with, the only person I've found attractive in the past 8 years, has a girlfriend, and has done for almost a year. I feel physically sick. FML
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By  Chazzster  |  21

If you think you love someone you don’t even know well enough to know they are already seeing someone for a year - You don’t know that person. If you think you love someone you don’t know that’s just infatuation, not love.

There is more than one person in this world that we can love and who will love us in return. But you won’t find that person until you put behind you the relationships that will not work and cannot be. Give yourself a little time to privately grieve as you heal and then move on to meet and get to know other people. And for your own sake, don’t talk to those new people about “the one that got away” there is nothing more off-putting than listening to someone who’s obsessing about someone else when they are with you.

COMMENTS
By  FrankHotpants  |  31

Love hurts, and it isn’t fair. Best thing to do is carry on and who knows, maybe things can be different later on. I do wonder though, like not a single attractive person in 8 years?? Where do you live again?

By  Chazzster  |  21

If you think you love someone you don’t even know well enough to know they are already seeing someone for a year - You don’t know that person. If you think you love someone you don’t know that’s just infatuation, not love.

There is more than one person in this world that we can love and who will love us in return. But you won’t find that person until you put behind you the relationships that will not work and cannot be. Give yourself a little time to privately grieve as you heal and then move on to meet and get to know other people. And for your own sake, don’t talk to those new people about “the one that got away” there is nothing more off-putting than listening to someone who’s obsessing about someone else when they are with you.

By  juggalo2  |  15

Don't worry. I'm sure you won't obsess over "the one that got away" for further years or even decades. You won't be mentally comparing every man you date in the future to your idealized image of this one, googling his name, stalking his social media, wondering what might have been. You're no doubt far too rational to engage in that sort of self-destructive thinking. Have fun!