Today, my boyfriend’s bed is so uncomfortable that even after six months of not seeing him, I’m sleeping on the floor so I can actually get some sleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend got so drunk that he was sick in the taxi, sick on me, then sick on himself when he was sitting on the toilet. What's more, I can't get into bed because he's been sick all over my half of the bed. So I'm sleeping on the sofa tonight. FML
Today, I need a new mattress. Last night, I slept on the floor. It was the best sleep I've had in a while. FML
Today, my boyfriend informed me that sharing a bed with me was like sleeping with a seizing cat. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my live-in boyfriend after a long dry spell. It was passionate and great, until I hurt my back changing positions. Now he refuses to touch me, going as far as sleeping on the couch to give me "enough space". Hello new dry spell. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that we can’t be together because I’m not the person he fell in love with since I don’t do anything all day. I’m 6 months pregnant and on bed rest. FML
Today, and like every day before it, my boyfriend’s snoring is keeping me up all night. FML
Today, it's now the third week my boyfriend's best friend has been sleeping on our bedroom floor because he doesn't want to face the consequences of his actions back at his parents' place. My boyfriend sees no problem with this, and says he can stay and live off us as long as he wants. FML
Today, my boyfriend kicked me out of bed so the dog could get under the covers. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend why he never wants to sleepover anymore. He said he loves me, but that sleeping next to me is like sleeping next to someone reenacting the crucifixion while being mauled to death by squirrels. So much for cuddling through the night. FML
Today, I just received the king-sized bed I'd ordered. My boyfriend moved out two days ago when we broke up. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
You can be like one of those old-timey couples with separate "his" and "hers" beds. Or go really old school and sleep in separate rooms.
JoanT 11
We actually have had this conversation when it gets to that point I want my own space and he wants his, I love him but we aren’t clingy people... plus i sleep with the tv on he doesn’t my dog sleeps with me he has no pets.... do what makes you happy
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
You can be like one of those old-timey couples with separate "his" and "hers" beds. Or go really old school and sleep in separate rooms.
JoanT 11
We actually have had this conversation when it gets to that point I want my own space and he wants his, I love him but we aren’t clingy people... plus i sleep with the tv on he doesn’t my dog sleeps with me he has no pets.... do what makes you happy
RichardPencil 32
Gotta have the doggo with you! So, what's wrong with his bed? Is it lumpy or too soft?
JoanT 11
Stupid soft like you sink into it and can’t get out soft
genuinegoodguy 9
Maybe a new boyfriend?
JoanT 11
Bed for boyfriend? Not worth it he’s the best.....and if nothing else at least he’s not you. 😂
Brightside86 31
Maybe get him one of those memory foam toppers.
JoanT 11
I’m not there enough to invest but it’s two mattresses if he would get a box spring it would be fine