By Gay younger brother - 30/06/2018 01:30
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I was making a joke. Of course I don’t expect them to have sex with their brother. A badly received joke obviously, but still a joke. I mean I would think incest between your kids would upset you more than their homosexuality. If that bothers you. God knows why people are still bothered by it. As long as no one is hurt and the people in the relationship are happy why care.
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They are concerned for you and your brother. And also for themselves. Someday they will need to count on you. And they know one day you will need to count on your kids. Give them a break. Don’t judge them so hard. This is not the dreams they had when you were born. Break it easy to them. Let them know you still love and respect them. It is a two way thing. Be kind.
Are you implying that because they are gay they won't be able to support their parents, or have a family later in life? Also if OP's parents are so disappointed they have a gay son and completely disregard his feelings he should not feel like he has to be overly compassionate to their feelings to make up for "betraying" them by being himself. Respect is a two way street.
Wait wait wait. You’re telling these kids who received homophobic backlash from their parents to not “judge them so hard”? Also saying that they aren’t fulfilling their parents’ dreams simply by being gay is disgusting. These kids shouldn’t have to “break it easy to them”, whatever that means. It’s not a test they did badly on. It’s their sexuality, an uncontrollable factor. They don’t need to be soothing and sugarcoating bc of their parents’ delicate, close-minded sensibilities. Not to mention them being gay has nothing to do with whether or not they can take care of their parents in their old age. And it might be hard for them to love and respect their parents when they aren’t getting any of that back simply bc of their sexuality. You’re acting as if this revelation is so so horrible and painful for the poor parents who somehow can’t handle their children loving the same sex. The parents aren’t the victims here in the slightest and they don’t need to be coddled. The kids don’t need to be aggressive either, believe me, that’s not what I’m saying, but let’s not pretend the parents are the good guys here.
I think what they meant is that the parents may be worried that if they're gay they may not have children (partially, cause they probably don't understand the other ways to have children; partially, cause they might think that you may not want to have them at all (because you are gay, because they don't understand); and perhaps partially because they do understand it's difficult) and if their sons don't have any children they won't have anyone to help them when they're older. To be honest, what I get from this FML is that they're not over the moon for having gay son(s), because it's just new to them and different to what they've been raised to and that it will take time, but not that they're being overly judgemental or kicking them out or not willing to grow with them and learn to understand better. Which is really a pretty good outcome in more traditional families.
I'm sorry your parents said this, but that wont change who you are. I presume they are mostly worried about a lack of grandchildren. That isn't your fault nor your brothers. There will always be options when it comes to children, but you are young and have lots of time before that stage (you can choose to have/not have kids when YOU are ready). I hope your parents have a better reaction when you tell them.