allison25545

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Allison25545's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 05/06/2009 20:54 - Denmark

Today, I was at a bar. A fat guy looks at me for a while and sits down next to me. He turns and I expect that he'll hit on me. He then buttons down his shirt, presses his man boobs together and say to his friends “Look, I’ve got bigger tits than than the girl next to me!" His friends agreed. FML

agreeclassic 63 112

vote type 1 6 150

By gonavybeatarmy - 31/05/2012 05:28 - United States - San Diego

Today, I almost got kidnapped. Again. FML

agreeclassic 37 675

vote type 1 4 992

By ultraattitude - 22/04/2012 07:01 - United States - Union City

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

agreeclassic 32 022

vote type 1 12 634

By Fillifilo - 18/04/2012 04:38 - France

Today, I was having a hard time waking up. When I sat down for breakfast, my chair rocked backwards. I reflexively grabbed out at something to hold on to. Unfortunately, I grabbed the cereal box that was on the table. FML

agreeclassic 424

vote type 1 52

By Anonymous - 12/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Rock Island

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

agreeclassic 17 997

vote type 1 39 935