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Today, my landlady roasted a joint of beef and the whole house smelled wonderful. OK, even if I am a masochistic vegetarian and former omnivore, that was way beyond cruel. FML

#19152969
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6076) - you deserved it (24462)

On 02/24/2012 at 10:28am - misc - by i2xl (woman) - Canada

Today, since I was grounded, I tried to sneak out of my room to attend a party by climbing out the second-storey window and down the tree. I was unharmed, but I probably should have checked to see if my dad was in the garden before climbing down. FML

#19312594
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6073) - you deserved it (41343)

On 03/20/2012 at 5:47am - misc - by treehugger - Singapore

Today, I learned from my daughter's teacher that she has been wearing the same shirt for the past few weeks, ever since we had a fight about how I don't pay attention to her. FML

#20117763
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6071) - you deserved it (52342)

On 10/15/2012 at 6:28am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was listening to music, talking to a boy I like on MSN. He asked if I could share the song I was listening to, so I did. It wasn't until I had shared and fully transferred it did I realise it was actually the fake radio show I record on my own, in a phoney Australian accent. All 6 minutes of it. FML

#5830310
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6070) - you deserved it (24335)

On 10/14/2009 at 4:19pm - love - by LasagnaRawks (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I started a new job. I lost my work keys and had everyone running all over the building looking for them. We found them, hanging in the last lock I had used. They now all think I'm a nut. FML

#13256903
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6069) - you deserved it (20447)

On 09/29/2010 at 10:57pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. Several hours later I realize that I can't find my wallet. After looking all over my house and then the store parking lot, I had my credit cards cancelled. On the drive home, I feel something under me. It was my wallet. FML

#6629276
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6063) - you deserved it (25019)

On 12/06/2009 at 2:43am - money - by life_suxxx - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was walking my son to school. After yelling at him for not looking where he's walking, I grabbed his hand and pulled him closer to me. Not paying attention, I walked him right into a light pole. FML

#20511
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6061) - you deserved it (45724)

On 02/10/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by EOJ (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was giving a presentation at work, when I said, "But we could care less about that." My boss asked if I meant, "Couldn't care less." Wanting to avoid embarrassment, I tried to think up an excuse, only to end up blurting that it was my phone's auto-correct. FML

#18512301
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6060) - you deserved it (27581)

On 12/14/2011 at 4:21pm - work - by sharon (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I decided to cut class with one of my friends and we ended up going to Burger King. As we sat down at the table, I heard my name being called. My mum was getting lunch through the drive thru with my little brother and saw my car parked out front. FML

#7675609
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6058) - you deserved it (34110)

On 01/29/2010 at 2:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)

Today, I went to Busch Gardens. Trying to cool off, I got on a ride that soaked me to the bone. For the rest of the time I was there, my bra was visible through my clothes, along with the "Hell Yeah" printed on my underwear. FML

#19688596
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6054) - you deserved it (22337)

On 05/27/2012 at 1:15pm - misc - by taylortotscx - United States (Florida)

Today, I got caught stealing lollies. I am 25. FML

#2620
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6053) - you deserved it (48905)

On 01/26/2009 at 8:28am - misc - by Timmy - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was taking a dump at the Home Depot. After I was finished, I was bent over and pulling the toilet paper out of the holder. I pulled too hard, causing the dispenser lid to fling open and smack me on the back of the head. FML

#7150091
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6051) - you deserved it (16947)

On 01/04/2010 at 7:29pm - misc - by B-ran - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was at work, when I got bored and started spinning around in my chair for a little fun. As I was spinning, I went to grab my phone. I missed and sent my phone flying, hitting my coworker in the face. My boss witnessed the whole thing. FML

#13577689
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6048) - you deserved it (29369)

On 10/24/2010 at 3:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)



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