The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week

The top of the month

The top of the year The all-time greatest FMLs

Eww, what?

By Anonymous - 13/09/2026 22:00 - United States - Rancho Cucamonga

Today, I watched a coworker use an electric milk frother, lick it “clean”, then put it back in the break room drawer with the rest of the utensils. I had no idea it was her personal frother. I thought it was for everyone’s use, like the spoons, and I’ve been using it for days now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 332

You deserved it 91

Blasts from the past

By Anonymous - 17/09/2026 12:00 - United States - Rancho Cucamonga

Today, I think the universe is playing some cruel prank on me. Over the last few months I’ve had multiple exes reach out for various reasons. I’m talking exes from 20+ years ago to a guy I only got coffee with twice. Messages ranged from, “Hey how ya been?” to “I’ll still love or hate you.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 271

You deserved it 74

Body issues

By Dating sucks - 22/09/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, a guy I know asked me out after me losing 75lbs. I declined because I don’t want to be with someone who only wants me for my body. I asked him, “Where was this energy two years ago when I was 75lbs heavier?” He replied, “Can you blame me?” And people wonder why us women choose the bear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 118

You deserved it 279

Claws out

By Anonymous - 23/08/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, I rescued a tiny kitten from the rain and brought him inside. I dried him off, gave him food, and wrapped him in a blanket. He immediately climbed onto my lap, purred for ten minutes, then sprinted upstairs and started destroying my curtains. I saved a cat. The cat saved nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 145

You deserved it 239

Productivity

By Anonymous - 25/08/2026 09:00 - Canada

Today, it's been three days since I started using a habit-tracking app to become more productive. I created goals for exercising, reading, cleaning, drinking water, and going to bed early. Now after three days, I'd spent more time checking the app than doing any of the things it was tracking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 312

Not going well, how about you?

By Anonymous - 27/08/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, on top of learning that I have three discs pressing on my spinal column and a labral tear, I also found out my left testicle dropped, but not my right one. I'm nearly 40 and I need to see a urologist over this. After the surgeries to fix my spine and hip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 308

You deserved it 73

Pregnancy glow

By Anonymous - 28/08/2026 22:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, I had an irate patient scream at me to the point security had to be called for not printing out the pictures she wanted. I’m an on call ultrasound tech in the emergency department. She’s only about 7 weeks along and thought she was going to get a picture of a full-sized baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 425

You deserved it 91

Higher learning

By Anonymous - 06/09/2026 22:00 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I’ve returned to college in my thirties because I was finally ready to commit to a program of study. Unfortunately, I have zero organizational or time management skills at this point in my life and I can’t keep up with deadlines. I waited all this time just to crash and burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 163

You deserved it 295

Mystery

By Anonymous - 10/09/2026 12:00 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I just woke up to my boyfriend's Instagram account coming up as 'Instagram User', then found out I don’t have him on Snapchat anymore either. I don’t know what’s happening. You think he ghosted me? FML

I agree, your life sucks 338

You deserved it 72

Help wanted

By Anonymous - 14/09/2026 00:00 - United States - Leominster

Today, I just got the news that my mom wants to put down our dog because her back legs aren’t working well. I need someone to talk to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 346

You deserved it 83

Mystery solved

By Anonymous - 15/09/2026 20:00 - United States - Tacoma

Today, like every night, I heard a strange scratching sound coming from my bedroom wall. I checked the pipes, moved the furniture, and even called my landlord. He found the problem in five minutes: a loose radiator pipe. I'd spent three nights sleeping on the sofa because I thought something was living in the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 236

You deserved it 111

My love

By Anonymous - 17/09/2026 15:00 - Ethiopia - Addis Ababa

Today, I accidentally sent an email of love confession to my best friend, just to find out she calls all of her friends "My love" and my dumbass thought it was a special word she used only for me, and was convinced we were gay for each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 164

You deserved it 299

Found an out

By Anonymous - 19/09/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, my husband filed for divorce because he discovered that we're actually fourth cousins. I tried to insist that means absolutely nothing, but he won't listen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 74

The war on Christmas

By Juan - 23/09/2026 00:00 - Mexico

Today, my older sister forced me to tell my nephews, 8 and 6, that Santa Claus does not exist, because she was recently fired from her job and is too much of a coward to tell them she will no longer give them any Christmas gifts for the foreseeable future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 53

Windows 95

By Jandro - 30/08/2026 20:00 - Mexico

Today, I got written up for filing a complaint against IT for unplugging my computer while I was on my lunch break. I found out because one of my workmates warned me. I work with a computer so old, it takes about 40 minutes to get it running. The company refuses to update the equipment, because "it's unnecessary." FML

I agree, your life sucks 358

You deserved it 61

Modern life is rubbish

By Julie - 01/09/2026 15:00 - Germany

Today, I had much trouble backing an ultra modern VW moving van around a corner. Skill issue, you say? Well, yes: the car refused to let go of the brakes because there were a few blades of grass “blocking our way”. That mean-looking rock pile to the left, though, it trusted me to discover on my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 283

You deserved it 75

GOT brain

By Anonymous - 03/09/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a date with a cute Scottish guy from Tinder, who kept on referring to himself as "FROM THE NORTH" like he thought he was in Game of Thrones or something. I like the show too, but I sure didn’t appreciate being called a "SOFT SOUTHERNER" when I talked about being born in Plymouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 297

You deserved it 115

I'm not a magician

By oh hi - 08/09/2026 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I found a wallet on the pavement and took it to a police station. The officer opened it, looked at the ID, and said the owner lived two streets from me. I went back outside and nearly walked into said neighbour. He recognised his wallet immediately and hugged me. He then asked if I could also return his missing cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 315

You deserved it 70

Caught up in karma

By Anonymous - 10/09/2026 15:00 - United States - Buffalo

Today, while away at college, I had a flirty relationship with a girl living on the floor below me. It turned physical. Heavy petting, making out, lots of over the clothes stuff. Home on break and visiting my girlfriend at work, there she is, working with her, standing side by side as I walked up! What?! FML

I agree, your life sucks 51

You deserved it 965

What more do you want?

By ForeverUnemployed - 12/09/2026 09:00 - Japan

Today, I was informed that although I'm eligible for a position at a school in my new city, my information was not passed onto the school, as I'm not one of the top candidates. The position? Substitute teaching. My credentials? A teaching license in 3 core subjects and a master's degree in education. FML

I agree, your life sucks 329

You deserved it 70

Catwoman

By Anonymous - 14/09/2026 03:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I thought nobody was around so I meowed loud as fuck but actually there was some dude right behind me on a bike. Yeah, I know that's my fault, but… FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 442

IMPORTANT

By Anonymous - 15/09/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, I was cleaning out my email folders and found a message I'd sent myself five years ago with the subject "IMPORTANT." I opened it, expecting something useful. It was a reminder saying, "Remember to look up what this is about." I apparently trusted future me far too much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 248

Schadenfreude

By Anonymous - 19/09/2026 12:00 - United States - Collegeville

Today, I tripped and fell down some stairs at a family gathering. Instead of making sure I was OK, everyone laughed at me. Including my quadriplegic uncle, who asked his personal support worker to lift his arm just so he could point and laugh with everyone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 61

Connection is all around me…

By Anonymous - 21/09/2026 09:00 - United States - Two Rivers

Today, after I made a connection with someone I used to know from school, I came to find out the whole time we were “solely seeing” each other, he was banging the bartender, and some fellow bar patrons at the same time as the bartender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 62

Nobody Loves You (When You're Down and Out)

By Anonymous - 23/09/2026 03:00 - United States - Tucson

Today, I’m a good man, ready to settle down and build with a good woman, but no one wants to take a chance and build something with me because I'm temporarily living in a homeless shelter. That doesn’t make me unworthy or undeserving of love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 99

You deserved it 95

Have fun!

By Cool aunt - 23/08/2026 20:00 - Canada

Today, I bought my niece a huge stuffed teddy bear for her birthday because I wanted to be the cool aunt/uncle. She hugged it, smiled, and then immediately hugged the gift bag instead, because apparently it made a "funny" crinkly noise. I have officially been defeated by packaging. FML

I agree, your life sucks 240

You deserved it 128

It's not what you think

By Anonymous - 25/08/2026 15:00 - Costa Rica - Santa Cruz

Today, me (24) and my girlfriend (23) got ‘intimate’ on a private beach you can only get to by boat. Afterwards, she had to unironically put armbands on to swim back to boat just as another boat came by. I got called "Pedo!" multiple times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 208

You deserved it 89

New fangled car technology

By Anonymous - 27/08/2026 09:00 - United States - Denver

Today, I have a RAV4 with a power hatch that randomly opens when the key is in my pocket, and it has trashed my garage door. Good news: I can stop paying for garage door repairs by paying to convert the hatch to manual instead. Oh, and I was supposed to move a bunch of stuff out of storage tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 210

You deserved it 105

Blended family indeed

By Anonymous - 30/08/2026 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, due to my parents divorcing 30 years ago, marrying other people, and giving me a handful of half siblings, I found myself in the uniquely unpleasant situation of walking in on my sister having sex with my brother. (Stop panicking, they’re not blood related to each other, work it out!) FML

I agree, your life sucks 260

You deserved it 76

Advice wanted in the comments

By Why Did I choose to live? - 03/09/2026 12:00 - Germany

Today, my husband claimed that his brother is a changed man and that I'm the bitch for not forgetting. Said brother tortured me mentally and forced me into depression to the point of suicide multiple times. It took me four years to breathe normally after he moved out. Why am I married still? AITA? FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 97

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Shopping Relatable Transportation Embarrassing Clothes Job interview Work Annoying Food Health Dentist Animals Cats Neighbours Family Depression Mental health Pregnancy Smartphone Money Thief Argument Love Bikes Cars Pranks Weird Awkward Spooky

The Top

Today, I was getting ready for my first date with a boy I really like when my dad insisted on meeting him. My dad is super protective and a cop. He cleaned his gun in front of my date and made it clear he had to be careful with me. My date started to cry when we got to the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 888

You deserved it 6 407

Today, while I was getting a blowjob from my girlfriend in the shower, my mom stood outside the door the whole time, asking me about my day. My girlfriend never stopped going, and my mom, who was unaware that my girl was with me in the shower, is now getting me tested for speech impairment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 690

You deserved it 711

Random

Today, I had to teach my 16-year-old brother how to use a toaster. He thought you just plug it in and wait for it to "pre-heat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 994

You deserved it 1 695

Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 209

You deserved it 52 291

Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. She pulls out a freezer bag full of condoms and says "I have some cooler ones upstairs, if you want his penis to glow in the dark." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 930

You deserved it 4 614

Today, my two year old girl said "motherfucker". Everyone laughed, even her grandparents. Our family is insane. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 111

You deserved it 9 241

Today, I backed a van into another car at work, damaging the tailgate in the process. I work at a panel beater. The van I was driving had just had a brand new tailgate put on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 342

You deserved it 1 945

Today, I’m too damn nice. I bought a cart of groceries for someone who was asking for help buying food outside a grocery store, so now I get to deal with the self-hatred that comes with being too nice for my own good. Again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 273

You deserved it 783