Today, I spent two hours making a cake that I'd promised my class for weeks. I boarded the train to school, but soon dozed off. A few minutes later, I awoke with a start and noticed a chunk of the cake missing and a homeless man next to me with frosting around his mouth. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I woke up early and spent hours baking and icing a three-tier cake for my friend's eighteenth birthday, which is this evening. I just found out my mother threw it in the compost bin because she's on a diet and it was "tempting" her. FML
Today, I spent hours baking a multi-layered, detailed cake from scratch for my mom's birthday. It took two seconds for my dog to devour the cake while I picked up a spoon I dropped on the floor. FML
Today, I wanted to be nice to my boyfriend and buy him a cake. Not only did I drop it in the bus, when I got home I forgot that I'd put it on my bed, and sat on it. FML
Today, I bought a cake. I then immediately forgot what I was carrying, opened the door to my car, and tossed the bag into the back seat. FML
Today, I woke up early to bake cinnamon rolls for a party. I came home later to find the whole tray spilled onto the floor, most of the rolls eaten, and my dog sitting happily nearby. FML
Today, I volunteered to bring a homemade dessert to a family dinner. I made a cheesecake, decorated it beautifully, and carried it across town on the train. When I arrived, everyone complimented it. Then I realized I'd forgotten the removable bottom of the pan, so the cheesecake was still sitting inside a metal ring and couldn't be served. FML
Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML
Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML
Today, someone brought cake to class. Trying to get some attention from the guy I have a crush on, I asked if he wanted my piece of cake. He accepted it, and then offered it to another girl. FML
Today, it's my birthday and I was very happy. When the moment came to blow the candles, all of the decoration on the cake flew off. It had taken an hour to make and set them on the cake. FML
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Top comments
super3286 14
wow dont fall asleep in public transportation
docscientist 9
The homeless have birthdays too.
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Comments (175)
Omorfessa 0
Gah.
I_iz_B_a_troll 23
Op, you can't have your cake and eat it too!
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
agreed^. who cares if some hobo took your cake whilst you were sleeping at least he didn't take you virginity, now that would be a FML
fakeaccountX 6
Sorry. I was hungry.
TroII 0
I say fake she is probally fat n took the bite out n now makin an excuse xP
KingDingALing 9
11- Just like your mom! Oooo! BURN! I'm sorry...I just felt like acting immature for a moment. I mean...KaySL told me to say a mom joke!
ChubbyCake 5
Don't blame the guy OP. We all know it wasn't him.
Elixa 0
You should have licked the frosting off his mouth and told him he's been a very very naughty little homeless man ;)
zp5 4
well at least he didn't take the whole thing and run with it.
mesnugglez 0
haha ydi for falling asleep.
chewbacca69 0
at least he didn't rape u and eat the cake
Siji 0
At least he didn't rape the cake and eat you!
Fresh4416 0
36 this isn't a bad porno
AlterFukiinRoccz 0
cake <3
gopherguy 0
It would be more of an FML if OP was a guy and it wasn't white frosting on the hobos mouth, it was something else...
JUST_STFU_N_GTFO 0
Lame immature comment coming right up: OP, I bet the cake tasted so BAD that he only ate the chunk he took. In that case, count your blessing because I'm pretty sure it would had given your students/ classmates food poisoning. :P
sydneybeau 7
let him eat cake.
Elixa 0
Awe that's cute little Kay missed Elixa didn't she?! oh she sure did! What's wrong with licking cum out of my hair, seriously?I like the taste. Besides its better then you, who probably licks their own ******, cuz no one else can stand the smell! and I know for a fact that you missed looking at my luscious scrumptious melons, so stop hating you smelly ****.
rallets 22
ahh let him eat cake ^^^^ dammit #87 >:O
JUST_STFU_N_GTFO 0
<_< Those are fighting words!
melkell 0
96, are you trying to make it obvious that you're not real? I really think you should be reported or banned. Being a **** isn't a good thing, don't show it off.
Elixa 0
Oh go shove a ***** up your ass George Castanza!!
Necromal 2
87 98 are they still teaching that lie in schools?
EffinAhole 0
lie? I'm confused. Op- Why-tf was the cake exposed? Was it not in a box or rapped up really good? Also, you got balls falling asleep where hobos and prostitutes hang.
Necromal 2
the thing about Marie antoinette saying "let them eat cake"
GaryBusey1121 0
My advice if many advices is to let the man enjoy the cake & feel good about yourself for feeding the less fortunate. What kind of cake it was anyways? Chocolate, Vanilla, Red Velvet that's my favorite. Was the homeless man in some way offended by the taste of the cake? it's pretty bad when a starving man with a whole cake available to him only eats a "chunk." Do it again tomorrow but add laxatives in the cake.
Kasevam 0
"A homeless guy did it" is always a valid excuse.
super3286 14
wow dont fall asleep in public transportation
OrginalOwen 0
poop
GDIalex 11
..your life
sammiesam221 0
haha!!!!
docscientist 9
The homeless have birthdays too.
pinkpillowz 0
hahahatastetest!
HahaHokayThen 10
some, such as myself, were born without a birthday. :(
Dementos 2
#77 I AM CONFUZZELED. and also quite stupid so how does that work?
elloelen 0
rofl amazing
yuukicross_fml 0
ur so hot :3
beezy_gurl13 0
this here just made my day :D
mad_hatter0666 22
lol
SuperFlyDinosaur 0
weell poor homeless guuy you shouldnt be complaining. what if you were a homeless man? think about it.
squirell_AIDS69 0
Agreed. If it was me and I was homeless, chances are I would have taken the whole cake. At least he was nice enough to only take a piece.
I_iz_B_a_troll 23
Y'all are dicks. If you're homeless that's probably your fault and you shouldn't steal from innocent people... For all you know op mightve given him money if he had asked.
squirell_AIDS69 0
It's only a cake.
I_iz_B_a_troll 23
ONLY?!?!?!!!!?!!? DON'T YOU ******* TELL ME ITS ONLY A ****** CAKE BITCH. IT'S NEVER "ONLY" CAKE ************!!!!!! WTF YOU TALKIN BOUT ONLY CAKE?!??!!! CAKE IS A GIFT FROM GOD, NOT SOMETHING TO BE TAKEN LIGHTLY!!!!!! ****, ESPECIALLY IF IT WAS CHEESECAKE!!!! CHEESECAKE IS THE GOD OF ALL CAKES!!!!!!!! BUT SINCE IT WASNT CHEESECAKE, MAYBE IT WAS "ONLY CAKE". STILL HATE THAT ANTI-CAKE STATEMENT THOUGH, YOU IGNORANT BIGOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MagicGiraffe 12
I agree with 24, most hobos are the way they are because they are lazy and/or dropouts. doesn't take someone special to finish high school, or to get a job.
collegegirl87 0
Yeah or they are druggies and alcoholics.
JUST_STFU_N_GTFO 0
Just to add my 2 cents: There are people here in Florida whose jobs let them go because of the economy. Lots of them are too much in debt and loose their homes and belongings. I don't think is anyone's fault, things are what they are. :( However, I'll tell you this; While walking to school, I had to lend my phone to a person who was just in agony because he just lost his home. I tried to calm him down, but shit! There is no calming down from the fact that you will probably sleep out in the cold with your tummy rumbling. :'[ I really, really wish never to experience that again!
brootalxkeni 0
that's gross x[
brootalxkeni 0
what a rude ass homeless guy. disgraceful eww
docscientist 9
Absolute ignorance about why many people are homeless.
xlossofmex 0
Actually you are all wrong. Most legitimately homeless people have mental disabilities and no one to take care of them. There are some that end up homeless through hard times but many are mentally disabled.
MrTvor 0
97 is correct 95% of homeless people have mental disabilities.
JUST_STFU_N_GTFO 0
@102, Was the diagnosis pre or post homelessness? If it was post then I'm not necessarily ignorant. The homeless could had lost their jobs due to X reason/s and so forced into what they are. Maybe that's when they fall insane, when they start to feel helpless and all the things god knows what they surely feel.
xlossofmex 0
The statistic is more like half have mental illnesses but still. A lot of times it is pre homelessness. Many are schizophrenic, bipolar, etc and can't hold jobs. These people either refuse to believe they are mentally ill and are shunned by their family because they refuse to get help or cannot be reasoned with. Do some research guys. Just as a little tidbit, I read a statistic saying that there are more untreated schizophrenics on the streets than there are being treated in the united states. Go to google and look up "how many homeless are mentally disabled" and learn something today people. Otherwise you sound ignorant.
lv426master 0
24 is such a beautiful example of how some people just can't rise about the fundamental attribution error. It's a just world, isn't it? But only because you're not homeless.
jobart_fml 5
your fired!
jobart_fml 5
where the **** did u get that from?
SuperFlyDinosaur 0
maybe youre all right but still if youre homeless and you are hungry sleep on the streets and have barely any if not at all personal belongings you will do anything to stay alive.
lilerin 2
So you're going to tell me that almost all of the hookers, junkies and boozers that live in my area have mental issues? You're so wrong. They're addicts.
cruzer555 1
I agree! homeless people are just lazy, they could apply themselves instead of drinking their money!!!
SatansBiggestFan 4
the ignorance on this site is painful
princessbeee 4
"really class! a stranger ate the cake this morning. I swear I made it!" I guess you'll have to start listening to students when they claim to have their projects done.
samanthasantini 0
lol!
kman666 0
hahahaaha fail, that really sucks, I'd slap a hobo if I were you
PBaandJay 0
Agreed.
JUST_STFU_N_GTFO 0
Nah. Never hurt another human just because he stole food. It wasn't like he took OP's jewelry!
BabesYourAStar 0
Don't slap the homeless man. He is homeless, and probaly doesn't get much food. you should be happy, Because in a way, you've fed this man!
greekgirl10123 0
wow your nice....
DrAwesome 6
Maybe he saw the guy who took a chunk out of your cake.
JUST_STFU_N_GTFO 0
I know right! Maybe he started battling with the cake-stealer when the icing melted right into the floor. At the same time the homeless-man trips over another man's foot and lands, face first, on the icing. That explains why his mouth was covered with icing! xD
getonup 0
It wasn't "white" frosting was it?? haha I'll bet you awoke with a smile on your face..