Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Rochester, United States
Cultured
Today, I was telling my friends about a date I had recently that went badly, because the guy turned out to be a moron. I said the last straw was when I used the word "decipher" and was met with a blank stare. I was then met with more blank stares. FML
Top comments
electricshock19 12
You're the smart one of the family.
jgwyh 18
He went full retard.
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Comments (65)
electricshock19 12
You're the smart one of the family.
infinitegrace 21
It's says her friends and date didn't know what decipher meant. Not that her family didn't know. So your comment makes little sense in relation to the FML..
JMichael 25
Maybe OP considers her friends as part of her family? I have a friend that's like a brother to me.
GEBEH 14
Meh, even I know what it means and I'm from Sweden.. on the other hand I'm amazing :)
GEBEH 14
Every thumbdown I'm counting as internet bullying!
sjbartholome 14
Perhaps your friends gave you blanks stares because you chose to complain about something so small.
jazzy_123 20
how is that a small complaint? How do you expect for her to hold out a conversation with him if she wasn't amused? I know I'd get bored and "complain" to my friends the next day about how stupid he was.
MortenM 17
Probably not #1. OPs own statistics suggests that she's using the word wrongly. Why would everyone else not understand her?
jazzy_123 20
OP said she used the word "decipher" but she didn't state in what way. So there's no way of telling if she used it right or not.
JacobH34 10
*stares blankly*
Michaelgf 13
I think your date just wanted a reason to leave you.
Sandsh8rk 36
Jumping to conclusions isn't a good thing to do buddy.
Axipiter 24
It is if you put them on a mat... And then make it a Jump to Conclusions mat!
iateapenguin 27
Rather than jumping to conclusions, I think Michaelgf was just trying to be a dick. :P
Sir_ND_Pity 35
2 - You know what they say about making an assumption: you make an ass out of you and umption.
Michaelgf 13
We'll you shouldn't also jump to conclusions saying her date is dumb.
TechFire 25
62 - No. It means that you're an ass, and an ump will shun you
Michaelgf 13
I also do believe this FML makes more sense for her date to leave her with the bill by acting dumb and senseless.
jgwyh 18
He went full retard.
Pizzacheese4 13
NEVER go full retard.
ScottEdwards 5
You never go full retard
TheBookWyrm 18
Never go full retard.
stevenN659 24
Maybe a small pocket dictionary is in order for their next birthday/Christmas.
ariiewilliams 17
Decipher- to make out the meaning of. OP's friends and date shouldn't have a problem now.
meli1195 31
Because they're totally going to read your definition, right?
ThatFancyPenn 18
You don't even need a dictionary, if you aren't retarded you can usually... well decipher a word based on its context.
SirTimtastic 6
somebody needs a change of friends.
Welshite 39
Just because a person doesn't know one word doesn't mean s/he is a moron. I have plenty of friends and family who may not know the meaning of a particular word, but they aren't stupid. They ask and learn what it means. I don't know what else the guy did during the date, but not knowing the meaning of a word shouldn't be "the last straw".
Setareh23 34
@Welshite : I agree that not knowing one word doesn’t make you a moron. However I think that in a healthy relationship, you need to be intellectually compatible. I don’t mean you need the same level of book smarts or things like that. Just that they need to be “smart” enough to hold a conversation with you in which you can enjoy their company & respect their mind. If OP really values vocabulary and the dude did other things that made her feel they weren't intellectually compatible, I think it’s fine for her to see that situation as a “last straw” to a bad date. However she shouldn’t have gone around calling him a “moron” to her friends later. Just because he didn’t fit her view of smarts, doesn’t mean he’s stupid or inferior to her. They will both be better off finding dates they can mutually respect! :)
suri23 11
Ah, those three syllable words will trip you up every time :-)
stevenN659 24
syllable? what is this word you speak of? -_-
evilamoebaattack 20
you know, it's what she calls silly Bill.
BrickTamlandLamp 13
Even syllable has 3 syllables oh god the world is coming to an end
Crlnprz 11
#10 I think #8 was talking about 3 syllable words in general because decipher is 3.
crazytwinsmom 25
@55 sarcasm also has 3 syllables.
regenerate 19
sounds like you need new friends.
ThomasBombadil 31
Is anybody else as curious as I am as to how "decipher" was used? How about it OP, fill us in on the details.
KittenSandwich 9
Be happy for your large vocabulary!
little_one 20
No offensive but decipher isn't really an uncommon word. I don't believe use of that word means you have a large vocabulary.
SgtAssCheeks 21
When you want to have an elaborate discussion about stuff with your friends but you're too smart for them to understand. Smart people problems. I can relate!
askullnamedbilly 33
Having a large vocabulary does not actually make you smart, it just makes you SOUND smarter. Anyone can memorize a few complicated words, it's not a particularly difficult skill. Stop pretending it makes you superior.
Not_Impressed13 9
Because decipher is such a complicated word....
barfcannon 24
Albert Einstein has a quote along the lines of "if you can't explain it simply, then you don't understand it well enough". What I take from that is that using large words to talk to people who won't understand them is both stupid and elitist. Probably the opposite effect you're going for.
Wakachulak 22
#23, Being superior makes one superior. Wide vocabulary just makes it visible.
askullnamedbilly 33
Oooor maybe they have their heads full of things like chemistry or rocket science instead of People magazine, and do not care about the size of their vocabulary because they have other things to do with their life. As I've written above, memorizing a bunch of words is pretty easy, parrots can pull that off. So please, stop judging people because they do not know the meaning of a word that you do.
chinaski7628 32
Sorry 13, but your incomplete and badly worded first sentence kind of negated any point about smart people problems you were trying to make.