Today, I woke up to two text messages from my mother. The first said, "You could've had this for breakfast. How do you like your eggs?" The next text was a picture message of her naked. I think it was meant to be sent to her boyfriend. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidentally sent it to my dad and got a text back saying, "You definitely take after your mom." FML
Today, I made my mom breakfast in bed for her birthday. She was naked when I went to give it to her. FML
Today, I sent a romantic, flirty text to my boyfriend. A few minutes later, I got a reply from… my mom, saying, “I don’t think this was meant for me, but thanks for making my day awkward.” FML
Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML
Today, my mom asked me to take a picture of her and a friend before they went out to dinner. I was getting ready to take the picture when I noticed the box showing the most recent picture. It was a nude. Of my mom. FML
Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML
Today, my mother got a call from our old high school saying that they had fifteen freshmen boys in his office with a nude photo of me on their phones. I had sent that photo only to my boyfriend. Apparently he loves to share me. FML
Today, I sent a love message to my wife asking if she was horny. Minutes later, I realized that I sent it to my mother in law. FML
Today, I found out that the messages about the issues in my sex life that I'd been sending to my best friend had been sent to my mother via iMessage. She's coming over for dinner tomorrow. FML
Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML
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Top comments
I_iz_B_a_troll 23
Your dad likes em "over easy" while hes makin it "hard boiled" for your mom, eh? I hope this doesn't "scramble" your relationship, but let's be optimistic and stay "sunny-side up" (; Well those were some eggstremely lame puns! :P
littlexlion 4
Text her that you're a vegan.
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Comments (118)
ughigiveup 4
Bahaha FYL
madarchod 0
How can a text message contain picture? Then it is no longer a text message but a multimedia message.
BadasS14 0
Shut the fck up!..you got the point didnt you?!
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
that's when you text back I like my eggs unfertilised.
corporatescoundr 25
Op thinks it was for her boyfriend? so there's a chance it might be for you? O.o
bloobelly 0
EWIE!!
EffinAhole 0
19- thank you. couldn't have said it better myself
BadMofeelius 0
I guess your mom's boyfriend likes his eggs over easy
tesuan 0
The worst part of waking up is staring at your mum without her c-cup!
chlorinegreen 27
how do you like your eggs? fried or fertilized? haha YouTube it.
dsbs 9
Lol guise 12 was obviously joking. Can anybody take a joke anymore?
SexyGamerNerd110 8
o.o that really sucks.. and got to be a scary way to wake up..
Connorisawesome 0
I'm sorry, my username is a lie, I'm not awesome, I'm a bit of a prat really . Oh, and I collect turnips. Although I have been known to mistake the odd swede for a turnip every now and again, and buy one in error. What? It happens! Just thought I'd let you all know that. Thanks for listening.
illmatic2 16
14- Where is your picture? And where the **** do my comments keep going?!?!
FYLwindowlicker 0
Om Nom Nom, me eat the lame comments. My cat has more class than you, and is better looking!
Connorisawesome 0
I commend you on hacking my profile :P
cearalaken 0
i think your awesome
DevianceIsBliss 0
Did Sirin strike again?
Heypussycat 3
you are smokin!
geenna 4
j
Dollie01 0
that's disgusting. I would have been pissed at my mom.....
fluffyrocka 0
the eggs weren't very good anyway...
EpicPear 0
You should have a talk with her.
FaberDriveLuv 5
o_o Great.
KingDingALing 9
She's a milf. ;)
mouxouxou 11
.......Really?......
ninjanate 0
ya really
perdix 29
You should have written, "Evidently you like Eggs Benedict -- your eggs covered with a white creamy sauce" and send a picture of you. I hope your Dad has first dibs on the bacon.
hotdogcore 9
I lol'd at this... but hollandaise is yellow due to it's contents of mostly clarified butter and egg yolks.
perdix 29
On some days, so is the "other" egg-smothering sauce.
hotdogcore 9
They have antibiotics for that now... o_O
evildemonchild 18
perdix u never let us down (: I admire you (:
ktrose 0
Always a great comment from you! :)
BenignSociopath 10
LMFAO
Snarky50 0
Now you have a cute story, complete with a picture, to tell at her wedding! You saved the pic, right?
hockey_66 0
why would anyone save that picture?
I_iz_B_a_troll 23
Your dad likes em "over easy" while hes makin it "hard boiled" for your mom, eh? I hope this doesn't "scramble" your relationship, but let's be optimistic and stay "sunny-side up" (; Well those were some eggstremely lame puns! :P
boricuabebe 0
lmao
omgshaylaaa 0
I puked in my mouth a little
laney007 0
*instant face spasm* lmao
MissErikaHart 0
lol@41
cdatribe23 0
bahaha wow:P
Jaydos 0
That was easly the ******* lamest comment ever. just shut up
sexy6969 0
hey sexy
PBaandJay 0
Ahah that's so gross x) How old is she ? FYL