Today, after doing inventory at my job, I was approached by a co-worker who I had always thought was cute. I tried talking to her, but it was hard as I kept trembling and stuttering from spending two hours in a meat locker. Now she assumes that I'm "special". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to a grocery store after work, exhausted. I nodded politely at a woman who smiled at me repeatedly. I realized at checkout she thought I was someone she knew. I nodded through a full conversation without knowing who I was pretending to be. FML
Today, I saw my old high school crush in a grocery store. I panicked, because the last time I saw her, I was spouting embarrassing teenage incel horseshit at her, so I dodged out of view to look at something. She'd seen me, came over, and found me awkwardly crouched in the vegetable section, staring at a cucumber. FML
Today, I was stuck in an elevator with my workplace crush for 10 minutes. Trying to break the silence, I nervously said, “I’ve always thought you were amazing.” She smiled and whispered, “I thought you were the new maintenance guy.” I work in marketing. FML
Today, I had a conversation with the cute girl I like at work for the first time. I told her I worked in the camping department of the store, and we had a long chat about how she heard that the guy who runs that department is a complete dick head. I am the guy who runs that department. FML
Today, I went to work at my new job after taking a shower but I'd forgotten to put on deodorant. I started getting strange looks and wondered why, only to find out later that everyone was talking about me, including someone I have a crush on. FML
Today, I ran into someone I'd never had a crush on in school, but because I've realised we have a lot in common, I get nervous whenever I see him. I was so near to him while paying for food that I had an anxiety attack, and had to leave quickly. FML
Today, I was shopping in the mall. A cute store worker kept checking me out, so after I picked a few things I went up to her and started flirting. After a few seconds, she cut me off and said, "Actually I was watching you because you look like someone who would shoplift." FML
Today, I saw my crush working the only open till at the grocery store. When she saw me approach her queue, she immediately called for more cashiers. FML
Today, I decided to step out of my comfort zone and talk to my coworker because people have been saying I’m too shy. I say, "Hey" to a girl and she made fun of my voice. She’s the one who told me to talk more. FML
Today, I mistook a random stranger in the grocery store for my friend and started complaining about how annoying my coworkers are at the moment. The stranger just nodded, concerned, and slowly backed away. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
LiterOfCola 16
Tell her you can last two hours in her meat locker.
DocBastard 40
Did you ever consider, oh I don't know, talking to her when you WEREN'T hypothermic? Or is that just a crazy suggestion?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (56)
mfelax9556 8
Sounds familiar to my job
darkhakai 18
How hard would it have been to mention that you were freezing half to death while you were still talking to her? If she's a coworker, it's not like she wouldn't understand.
miyaviichan 27
Well, now you can prove her wrong! I mean, what have you got to lose (in her estimation) now, right!
silbot 11
I read your profile... God I love you.
Epikouros 32
You should have asked her to warm you up.
DollyDope 17
Sounds like an excuse a "special" person would make up...
MangaManiacNat 13
Just approach her later and explain the situation, I mean this is funny but hardly an FML when it can be easily righted.
onorexveritas 24
I do think you could still try to talk to her when you aren't freezing and make up for it.
StephenStills 6
Just remember: Forrest Gump got laid.
Homer1975 14
it's wonderful feeling in your heart now, than go away right now otherwise you guys become lover or couple …yelling party will coming soon dude
Raivyn_Grimm 9
dafuq I just read?