Cars, Sextoys and Transportation: What what?

What what?

By Anonymous - 25/10/2011 05:58 - United States

Today, my car broke down because someone stuck a dildo in the tail pipe. I'd parked in my driveway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 803

You deserved it 3 512

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Same thing different taste

By Char - 24/09/2017 19:00 - United Kingdom - Gravesend

Today, whilst at work, I had a woman come in with a problem with the seat in her car not moving backwards or forwards. There was a dildo stuck in the chair rail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 839

You deserved it 274

By Anonymous - 12/02/2012 04:25 - United States

Today, after parking my car, I was informed by an incredibly hot girl that my tail light was faulty. I tried hitting it to make it work again. Guess who has 5 stitches and a smashed tail light? FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 776

You deserved it 36 060

By someone - 09/12/2013 12:59 - United States - Mogadore

Today, my car broke down. I pulled to the side of the road to call a tow truck. After waiting what seemed like hours, the tow truck showed up, and then ran into the back of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 135

You deserved it 2 862

By ummWhat? - 23/12/2018 02:00

Today my car was broken into. The only thing taken were condoms and lighters I had in the glove box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 156

You deserved it 201

By ocroyalty - 01/02/2010 07:31 - United States

Today, I was trying to get my car out of my boyfriend's apartment garage but couldn't. Why? Because somebody decided to park in front if the garage door and have sex. Complete with steamed windows and loud noises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 523

You deserved it 2 665

By Anonymous - 12/08/2019 04:01

Today, in my tidy, small-town neighborhood, I parked my car 50 metres further back from my usual spot just across from our house on a half-empty public street, because it was taken. Apparently, someone didn't appreciate this. So much so, they put a used condom under my windshield wiper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 503

You deserved it 124

By jjuuuuuuulless - 17/12/2018 17:30

Today, my car's parking gear and parking brake failed. I watched as it rolled down a big hill into someone's 2017, $30,000 camper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 283

You deserved it 313

By carless - 15/08/2010 02:25 - United States

Today, my car was stolen. From my driveway. By the guy who sold it to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 899

You deserved it 4 230

By nozVail - 20/11/2015 23:52 - United States

Today, I drove to my cousin's house so he could help me fix my broken tail light. On the way there, I got pulled over for having a broken tail light. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 390

You deserved it 3 730

By Anonymous - 07/05/2016 01:40 - United States - Walnut

Today, I walked in on my mom in the bathroom, washing a dildo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 274

You deserved it 2 444

saIty 17

Tuesday 25 October 2011 12:01

Or maybe your car is a Transformer and was playing with itself.

WallyTheWombat 0

Tuesday 25 October 2011 12:04

Lol someone put a ***** in your "tailpipe".

Comments

maggotfoREVer 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 0:59

I was going to say that

JayAyyEmm 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 1:58

It was a virgin.

HappyPickles 11

Wednesday 26 October 2011 2:17

Someone else almost said this already: Sounds like your car had a boot-ie call

mgladin 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 2:51

Fake that is impossible sticking something in your vehicle tailpipe doesn't really cause any issues, pure myth!

awkwardaredevil 5

Wednesday 26 October 2011 4:03

That's where I left it!

ilovemetalcore 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 4:15

Never heard of that one before:p

1emma1997 0

Wednesday 26 October 2011 4:52

That is hilarious! I even said so to myself as I was reading this

ryryman 5

Wednesday 26 October 2011 4:57

Hahaha that's the funniest shit I have ever herd,

leadman1989 15

Wednesday 26 October 2011 5:10

Your car got raped! >:0

ernie7861 1

Wednesday 26 October 2011 5:28

That seems kinda difficult. You must either have a very small exhaust pipe or it was a HUGE *****.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my grandma drove me home from school early because I was sick. I went upstairs and heard my parents having sex. Embarrassed, I ran downstairs and was about to leave the house when I saw a car pull into the driveway. It was my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 824

You deserved it 254

Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 871

You deserved it 43 967

The Top

Today, when my dad said he was dating a woman he met at his retirees social club, I assumed it was a woman also in her 60s. Nope. Barmaid. A whole 42 years younger than him, 9 years younger than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 81

Today, my cat let out the biggest moan I have ever heard, while we were both in the living room. My dad heard and accused me of watching porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 515

You deserved it 3 232

Today, I had to babysit my dying grandmother, so I brought up my guitar. She hadn't said anything to anyone today, and the first thing and only thing she said was, "Stop. Make it stop" to me when I played. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 014

You deserved it 380

Today, my wife changed her Facebook status from "Married" to "Widowed". I'm scared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 058

You deserved it 5 255

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 107

You deserved it 3 496

Today, my baseball team had a game and one of our best players was injured sliding into first. I'm pretty fast so when the coach called my name I grabbed a helmet assuming it was finally my chance to get in the game. Turns out he just wanted me to get ice. The entire team couldn't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 403

You deserved it 4 674

What what?

Same thing different taste

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