Unpleasant, but clean

By deathparty352 - 12/10/2019 04:00

Today, I'd had enough of the excrement sticking in my butt hair. Now that I'm shaved, I feel my buttocks rubbing together. With every step. FML

I agree, your life sucks 769

You deserved it 1 439

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
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Same thing different taste

What even is that?

By git recked lul - 01/12/2023 06:00 - United States - Allen Park

Today, I felt an itch on my butt so I went to the bathroom to scratch it. It was actually a dried layer of skin that broke from years of wear and tear, and now every time I shit I feel immense pain for the next hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 150

By fatflabbyfail - 20/02/2010 06:09 - United States

Today, after having my bath, I realised that I've gotten so fat that I have to lift up my butt cheeks in order to dry underneath them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 147

You deserved it 42 309

By Anonymous - 19/04/2017 12:00 - United States

Today, I don't know what's worse, the fact that my hair sheds so much, or the fact that I find most of it in my butt crack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 237

You deserved it 422

By DaggerHole - 06/03/2014 14:54 - Australia

Today, I learned the worst part about being dared to shave your ass hair: Stubble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 116

You deserved it 16 459

By soapy - 01/10/2011 16:08 - Canada

Today, while taking a shower, my back hair caused so much friction against the bar of soap, it stuck for a good second before coming free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 070

You deserved it 8 931

By jack - 27/08/2015 10:56 - United Kingdom - London

Today, due to medication I am taking that causes constipation, I have become all too accustomed to using a disposable rubber glove to dig crap out of my own butthole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 157

You deserved it 2 423

By Anonymous - 12/11/2009 11:17 - Australia

Today, I realized that I hadn't shaved in so long that when the wind blew, the hairs on my legs moved in the breeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 854

You deserved it 49 454

Growing old gracefully

By Anonymous - 27/01/2017 18:25 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I found out that as I get closer to 40, I often need to wipe my arse when I fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 724

You deserved it 634

Arsehole

By Anonymous - 25/06/2022 14:00

Today, I was taking my shower, as usual. As I was putting soap on my behind, I heard a pop. I also felt a burning sensation near my butthole. I have a blood filled bubble in my arse, which got infiltrated with soap. I have a drums lesson in a bit. My butt is stinging. FML

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 128

By Anonymous - 10/09/2013 17:44 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, I realized that it's become a regular occurrence for my mother and me to talk about our pubic hair. I don't know which is worse, the fact that I now know that she shaves it, or the fact that we even talk about this stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 153

You deserved it 13 896

bullsonyourface 20

Saturday 12 October 2019 4:44

stick your underwear in your ass, wedgie style. problem solved

slkeithh 14

Saturday 12 October 2019 5:42

UMMMMMM. pretty sure your feces aren't supposed to be stuck in your ass-hair no matter the length. are you not wiping??? much less showering and washing??

Comments

bullsonyourface 20

Saturday 12 October 2019 4:44

stick your underwear in your ass, wedgie style. problem solved

prettyprincessla 5

Saturday 12 October 2019 5:11

Wait til it starts to grow back, and you feel the spiking hair feeling like bindi’s in your buttcrack!

Giovanni Adamo 16

Saturday 12 October 2019 5:31

ewww

slkeithh 14

Saturday 12 October 2019 5:42

UMMMMMM. pretty sure your feces aren't supposed to be stuck in your ass-hair no matter the length. are you not wiping??? much less showering and washing??

DKING123456789 16

Sunday 13 October 2019 1:47

I don’t think they mean big ******* chunks I think they mean like barely any or something, I really don’t ******* know tbh

Magtec 11

Saturday 12 October 2019 7:58

It's like smearing peanut butter into a shag carpet...

Mungolikecandy 19

Saturday 12 October 2019 8:07

Go European, invest in a bidet.

PirateSnozzle 8

Saturday 12 October 2019 13:23

You'll get used to the smooth rubbing but what you won't get used to is the prickly rubbing when it starts growing back. That will drive you mad, especially if you've been a bit rough with the old razor. If you're considering this a permanent solution I'd suggest getting it waxed so it doesn't grow back quite so fast and prickly. However, I think it might be better to look into why you seem to have permanent dangle-berries. Are you just that hairy or do you have poop issues?

Seeya55 31

Sunday 13 October 2019 12:26

I'm going to assume overly hairy. OP should have just trimmed. You know what ALSO the worst? Once you start sweating at all back there he's going to be uncomfortable af all day. Your ass hair helps create friction which helps keep it dry and unirritated. OP needs to clean himself better, wet wipes while away from home and maybe a bidet at home if he can't quickly shower.