Today, when I woke up, one half of my face was smooth and clear and the other half looked as if I got slapped by the Hand of Puberty itself. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I woke up after a long night of partying. When I went to wash off my face, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. My missing tooth was almost enough to make me overlook my black eye. FML
Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML
Today, as I rushed to get my pants on, I slipped and bashed my forehead against the solid oak back board of my bed. School starts in 30 minutes and I look like I lost a boxing match horribly. FML
Today, a picture fell off of the wall in the middle of the night. It hit me smack bang in the middle of face. FML
Today, my hormones decided to make my pimples appear symmetrically on my face around my nose and mouth. FML
Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML
Today, I shaved off half of my right eyebrow by accident. It still looks better than my left eyebrow. FML
Today, I was beaten up by a complete stranger for “giving her a dirty look.” I can’t see my own face. FML
Today, I found myself admiring my eyelids for being the only parts of my face not covered in acne. FML
Today, I ran a hand down my freshly shaven leg to appreciate the smoothness, only to come up with a hand covered in blood. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Welshite 40
Now is the time to embrace your inner villain and call yourself Two-Face. Avoid bats if possible.
Emma1562 35
Well mine are in the shape of a mustache rn so you're okay
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (84)
pshtuthinkicare 19
That sucks, trust me I'd know. I don't know if this is the issue, but maybe you should try sleeping on your back and not let your face touch your pillow. Because the oils from your skin and hair get absorbed into the pillow, it could cause breakouts if your face comes in contact with the pillow. Anyway, don't worry too much. It's just acne :) everyone gets it.
dehvi 9
Sounds as if you need to wash your pillow cases.
flamingarrow59 21
its most likely a nerve problem because i have the same thing, my left cheek grows hair alot faster than everywhere else
laden_swallow09 35
Wash yo pillowcases. Twice a week if need be.
Riceball__o3o 15
Have you considered wearing the mask from Phantom of the Opera?
SouthMedic 11
The best way to prevent this is to wash your pillow case at least twice a week
ceralkiller911 7
wash your pillow case. takes the oil out.
xJonellos 23
Satin pillowcases, my friend!
brittanybenton 10
At least it's only one side........
katertott 44
Though washing your sheets is a good idea, if you'd recently done just that, you could possibly be having a reaction to the detergent (or scent booster, fabric softener, etc). Speaking from experience here. My family now uses "ALL free and clear", so no more Jekyll & Hydes at this house!