Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whisky, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, my son had a baby so I poured out the last of the bottle of scotch bought by my grandfather around about 1910. There was just enough for two glasses. I took a sip and spat it out, leading to my son confessing that he drank it as a teenager and replaced it with god knows what brown liquid. FML
Today, my son tried my great-grandad's 90 year-old whiskey, didn’t like it, and poured it all down the sink. When I confronted him, he confidently told me it was nasty and must have expired, so he did me a favour and poured it away and washed the bottle. I had to walk away and remind myself I love him. FML
Today, I went into my fridge and someone had drank all the beer. Only my 8-year-old son lives with me. FML
Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML
Today, I discovered that last night, my son snuck downstairs at 3am, drank two glasses of my very expensive wine, threw up on his bed, and then slept in his own vomit. My son is 14. FML
Today, against my wishes, my son snuck out of my house to go partying. When he came home, I called him in so I could properly discipline him. While I was talking, he staggered to our fish tank, pulled open the lid, and vomited straight into it. FML
Today, my 11-year-old cousin walked up to me as I was enjoying a glass of wine with friends at my mother's birthday party. Thinking she wouldn't like it anyway, I let her try. The little fucker drank the entire glass in one go, adding, "Usually, daddy gives me vodka." Good to know what my family is up to. FML
Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML
Today, after a fight, my boyfriend brought me a soda that exploded when I opened it. Furious at his constant childish bullshit, I threw his ass out. Two hours later, my son confessed that he'd shaken the cans as a joke. I tried to call my boyfriend, but he'd blocked my number. FML
Today, while searching for the pungent odor that has been lingering in my son's bedroom, I discovered various types of juice my son has been "storing" to make wine. FML
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Top comments
Feklfekl2222 32
As much as it won't replace the sentimental value in the slightest I would get him to pay for two or three times the value of the whiskey, and generally make his life hell for a while
nitsud82 14
Bright side, no jury in the world will convict when this goes to trial for murder.
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Comments (186)
reaxion 25
Couldn't have been that good if you can't spell it correctly. Scottish whisky has no 'e'. If yours did it's not the real thing.
Nethri 4
Guess you will learn to hide your stuff and discipline your kids better.
merkos 5
Ground him until he is out of the house.
Alastrina_fml 20
If I were the OP, I'd have to kill him. That royally sucks. =/
shavednipples 22
a lot of commenters don't seem to understand a few basic things. I don't know OP's full story, but if his/her son is old enough to throw a secret party, he's old enough to accept responsibility for his actions. it's not the parents fault. the son probably knew the whiskey was sentimental and valuable, but didn't care because he wanted to impress friends or just get drunk on anything. even if the bottle was in a locked room or something (OP didn't specify), someone at the party would have probably figured out how to pick the lock. so unless you expect every single parent to look up their booze in a combination/fingerprint safe, it is 100% the son's fault. sorry about your whiskey, OP
still_guns 16
Personally, I hate all types of alcohol, so I don't care
white_night91 2
Well..... time to beat the little shit
MDaemonM 14
kick.his.ass to the curb AND CURB STOMP HIM WITH A CEMENT TRUCK
NostalgiaFreak9 43
Guess who’s now grounded for life and will be held financially responsible for the cost of the lost whiskey? A further punishment for him would be adjusting the cost for inflation.