Today, my pregnancy test came back positive. The only way I could have gotten pregnant is from having gotten drunk and sleeping with my ex. We broke up because I didn't want children. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the only positive thing my ex boyfriend left me was my pregnancy test. FML
Today, I found out I'm pregnant with my soon-to-be ex-husband's baby from the moment we agreed to have sex one last time together. FML
Today, after my boyfriend broke up with me, the only thing positive about my day was a pregnancy test. FML
Today, my ex told me that she's 3 weeks pregnant with my child. Not only was she on her period when I broke up with her last week, her friend let me know that the positive pregnancy test she showed me was a fake that she'd bought online. FML
Today, after spending thousands on 4 failed IVF attempts, my husband of 3 years told me he had a drunken one night stand last month with his ex, who he said he hasn’t spoken to in years, is pregnant with his baby. There goes our future together. I thought trust and being honest meant something, but obviously not. FML
Today, I divorced my husband of 20 years. The only positive thing about my day was my pregnancy test. Yes, it was his. FML
Today, I got the results proving if my ex-girlfriend's kid was mine. The results came back negative and I can't have kids. This wouldn't be a problem if I didn't have 3 kids with my wife. FML
Today, I found I’m pregnant. I hooked up with my ex when my now boyfriend and I had broken up for a week. My ex doesn’t want kids. It’s most likely my ex's kid. My boyfriend has now proposed. FML
Today, I found out I’m pregnant and got excited. We’d never discussed kids before since we’ve only been dating a year, but I was so happy… until I told him, and his face just fell. I left after he drank himself unconscious and I’m now at my mum's house FML
Today, my husband is leaving me because he did a paternity test on our 4 year-old daughter and found out she’s not his. The night of my bachelorette party I drunkenly hooked up with two men so I don’t know who the father is. He doesn’t understand that I was drunk and that family isn’t about blood, it’s about love. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Olovio 5
If only you were a witch. You could just point your wand at your uterus and shout FETUS DELETUS!
SkardeyKat 3
I've been in a situation almost exactly like this. Think twice before making any decisions based on fear of the unknown. My children ended up being such a blessing and saved my life. And to think, I didn't even want them!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (56)
Skittlepickle 13
Try to enjoy it anyways, it'll work out:) I know someone who hated kids and ended up pregnant, but she kept the baby and now she would give up her life for her daughter. Good luck:)
withered 30
I don't think people should take such risks when abortion and adoption are an option. Not everyone gets their parental instinct "magically" after having an unwanted child and keeping a child because you HOPE you won't hate it/regret it is a bad idea and could end up badly for the child. Not to mention you could be miserable for being stuck in a life you never wanted. People should put more thought into having children than "we'll see what happens".
mrbendystraw 0
YDI for not having protection.
kernousse_fml 13
For someone who doesn't want kids you don't seem very much into birth control... ever heard of condom? pill?...
radiocaf 29
You've been sitting on that joke for a while, haven't ya? Lol.
fo_86 0
What did you expect to happen? Do you not know how babies are made? Being drunk is no excuse. Ugh people make me sick.
KnucklesDeep 5
You are going to make an absolutely terrible mother.
spd2fst4u 5
Abort!! Abort!!
Hansemans 17
If you can't behave when drunk, don't get drunk. If you can't drink without getting drunk, don't drink.
Timmeeh 17
The number of people on high horses to an extreme degree mixed with the general self righteousness pouring from these comments is in equal parts depressing and hilarious.
KiddNYC1O 22
Talk about a gamble.