Today, my girlfriend woke me at 5am, just to say how great it was that I could still sleep two more hours before leaving for work. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my girlfriend begged me to stay up late and video chat with her because she missed me. Even though I work early mornings, I reluctantly agreed. After waiting up until 2am for her to get online, I gave up. She had fallen asleep. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me I could sleep in. Twenty minutes later, she was banging on the door, yelling, "Get up, fat lazy fuck! It's seven o'clock, we have chores! You expect me to do everything for your worthless ass!" FML
Today, after a long 16 hour shift, I was milliseconds from sleep when my girlfriend said she "wants to talk". I'm now writing this from the couch. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up at 5am to tell me she was mad at me. Apparently I did something bad in her dream. She still won't talk to me. FML
Today, after my girlfriend had a nightmare this morning, I stayed home because she has really bad anxiety issues. A couple of hours later, she's pissed because I said I would stay up, but I fell asleep. FML
Today, sleeping in a little late, I was woken up by my phone. Still tired, I quickly checked the display to realize it was my girlfriend calling. I pick up the phone saying, "Hey baby girl!" She seemed pretty startled, so I double-checked and realized it was my new boss, who has the name as my girlfriend. FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
Today, my girlfriend of over a year woke me up at 4:30 in the morning by sticking her hand down my pants. She immediately stopped when I was awake enough to reciprocate and said, "I couldn't sleep. I was bored. Talk to me." FML
Today, I woke up at 5:30 and made the half hour drive to work only to find out that it was my day off. After finally getting back home and into bed, my boss called, requesting that I come back to work since I was "already up". FML
Today, I got to sleep in late for the first time in 3 years, as wife took our two young daughters out of town to visit with her parents. I told my mother that I was really looking forward to being able to sleep in this morning. The phone rang at 7:30. It was my mother asking me how I slept. FML
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Top comments
BimmerDriver 23
Isn't the feeling of knowing you have more time to sleep one of the best feelings ever though?!?
yoloswagg54 9
FYL, falling back asleep is impossible for me :(
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Comments (83)
ninjalovin 8
Time to put her to sleep, mate.
Bcfrmkc816 17
How considerate of her she deserves thank you satisfaction
xkncas 8
Yeah, the satisfaction of a black eye/pimp slap. :-p
Jemm_fml 29
Hey Bert, are you sleeping?!
captainleezy 10
If my old lady did this to me, she wouldn't be able to wake up in the morning:)
badguy500 4
Should of ****** her ass that would of kept her from doing that again
anders09ma 7
Lol that sounds like something that would happen in a tv show XD Girls; were idiots XD
wubu18 6
Do that to her next time. She will understand the pain.
onorexveritas 23
atleast you knew how much time you had left
Allennis44 16
Might as well ask her to chop the morning wood then.
Quiet_one 22
Oh man, there are a lot of things I'll tolerate, but messing with my sleep is not one of them. If my boyfriend did that I'd be pissed- more than once and I'd dump his ass. That's some grade A passive aggressive crap. I had a roommate like that once- that friendship did not survive.