Today, my friend set me up with a cute guy who is very germaphobic. So, I spent four hours cleaning my apartment. Two minutes into the date, I sneezed. He politely told me he wasn't feeling well and left. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a date with a guy I met online. He took me to a restaurant where I was allergic to practically everything on the menu. I sneezed five or six times within the first 15 minutes and spent the rest of the lunch awkwardly trying to explain I wasn't allergic to him, just the food and spices floating around us. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend, and ended up sitting next to this girl who wouldn't stop sneezing. Grossed out, I asked my boyfriend if we could switch seats. After doing so, the girl immediately stopped sneezing and started flirting with him. FML
Today, my friend set me up on a blind date, to get my mind off having been recently broken up with. The guy was perfect: tall, muscular, handsome. But while we were watching a movie, I saw him dig around in his nose, then wipe his finger on my pants. FML
Today, I was on a date with a girl and everything was going great. As I took her back to her house and walked her to her door, I leaned in for a kiss. She seemed to really enjoy it, so I went for another but as I leaned in again, I sneezed uncontrollably, shooting her face with saliva and snot. FML
Today, I went home with the guy I’ve been casually seeing. His place was a disgusting pigsty so I made an excuse to leave. Later he texted me, ending things. Online I saw him bitching about how no one can pass his “girlfriend test” and that a real woman would happily clean for her man. FML
Today, I felt comfortable enough to invite the guy I’ve been seeing over to my apartment for the first time. Things immediately got weird when he started to inspect my place top to bottom to make sure it was “clean to his standards”. I told him to leave when he started going in my closet. FML
Today, my friend fixed me up with a guy from her workplace. I'm painfully shy, so I really appreciated it and was looking forward to meeting him, since she described him as very sweet. Once the date got started, he continuously made fun of my speech impediment, until I finally left in tears. FML
Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML
Today, I was making out with a guy I really like. Midway through, he stopped and said he had to sneeze. After waiting several seconds, he said the urge went away and we kept making out. Ten seconds later, he violently sneezed in my open mouth. FML
Today, I had a first date. We really hit it off and wound up watching movies together and talking late into the night. I ignored a developing migraine all night, then tried to leave hurriedly when it got bad. He stalled me leaving by asking what's wrong. I started vomiting. FML
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Top comments
Rynk95 11
Not worth the effort.
GoWithTheFro 10
Well he'SNOT good enough for you :D
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Comments (116)
MiddleThumb 0
That's what you get for dusting
mizzxxgirlxx 2
ha
vettle 6
Oh god you're lucky stay away from that!
anjtrg_1112 23
Hey, it's his loss :) also, if he freaked out over a sneeze, it probably wouldn't have worked out anyway. Besides, you have a nice, clean apartment now :)
Breaker132 8
F HIS life, not yours; sure, you may have had to break your back over your apartment, but he just missed out on one great girlfriend over a trivial matter, phobia or not. Besides, I doubt it'd be good at all to be with a person ("cute" or not,) that will freak out over sneezing, let alone kissing/restaurants, etc.
ivanhoe4u 3
Good riddance. At least your place is clean.
littlefun41 0
A guy would be crazy to leave a girl who knows how to clean. Did you make him a sandwhich too?
Raynieday1234 0
At least your apartment is clean
TheNewGuy03 29
****, does he live in a cube? I bet it takes 10 minutes for him to open a door. You would have never been intimate with him, so consider yourself saved (and your apartment cleaned). |the kid|
hotforkegger 4
You're hot new guy!
Cmcelroy 0
That is crap. He ain't worth your time.